Stay Awake
by VeltPunch
Summary: AU Hikaru has no ghost, he has a split personality who goes by Sai. And he wonders, who is really Akira's rival? Him or Sai?
1. callit a coldsweat start splitting hairs

_This story is AU. Alternate Universe, in other words. Sai isn't a ghost at all, he's Hikaru's like...split, other half, alternate ego, whatever you want to call it. _

_--(theme) Stay Awake ((Dreams only last the night))_

Sadly, Hikaru had found himself—and his life for that particular matter—in a bit of an obtuse circle.

And the circle had some parts to it. There was Akari, Mitani, Kaga and Tsuitsui, who he was very happy to say he still kept in touch with still. And of course, Touya Akira, and the part of this particular circle that he spent most of his time in, with fellow Go pros and higher dans. Waya, Isumi and others from his insei days also had a rather substantial chunk of his time, and he didn't mind in the slightest. In fact, he enjoyed how well-rounded his life was and was happy in the medium of it all. Hikaru found that his life was particularly about balance, if anything. And there was always one thing that seemed to throw his entire life off its very happy circle.

And that was Sai.

At first, after having a horrible allergic reaction to the copious amounts of dust in his grandfather's attic, he ended up having some sort of heart failure, and a near death experience.

Of course, he was perfectly fine _now_, but he realized in hindsight he really wasn't.

That was until; he had met, or _heard_, Fujiwara Sai. Or at least, that was what the voice _claimed _to be. How true that was, at this point in hindsight, Hikaru didn't know anymore. He had believed readily and steadfastly, as a child who was prone to things like Star Wars, Sci-fi action and horror stories about ghosts. In fact, he was quiet happy that he had a ghost talking to him, even if he couldn't see said ghost. And then, when the ghost asked to play Go, Hikaru didn't really mind either. After all, he had a ghost, right? That was too cool an option to pass up.

So, following the voice in his head, he was brought to the Go Salon owned by Touya Koyo, the Meijin. And the day ended up he had completely-or Sai had-slaughtered the Meijin's so, Touya Akira, in Go.

He hadn't meant to. He just placed the stones where Sai asked him to.

When the boy asked for a rematch, Hikaru was perfectly fine with that, in fact, Sai encouraged it, and he felt as if he had to oblige the 'ghost' and played the boy again. And had crushed him. To the point that Akira had actually scattered the evidence of such a crushing defeat over the floor of the Go salon. Hikaru had been taken aback by the sheer determination of the boy to win, and the fact that Sai found his actions highly amusing, telling Hikaru that the boy was in fact going to grow up to be good one day.

It was then, that Hikaru decided that perhaps letting his ghost play all the time wasn't a very good idea.

So he let his ghost play online, and, for an odd reason for a ghost who claimed to be from 1,000 years ago, seemed to know what an internet was, and a computer for that matter.

"_Net Go?" The ghost asked petulantly from his head._

_Hikaru nodded, even though it really wasn't to anyone but himself. "Yeah. Trust me, it'll be fun."_

Naturally, Sai completely massacred every single one of his opponents-pro or not-to the point he had world renowned attention and that every time they signed in, people clamored for their attention until Hikaru could barely stand it. They had to change the privacy settings so that they sent the requests.

And, life continued on rather easily in Hikaru's circle. As a new sho-dan, he met up with new higher dans he knew, from Moroshita's study group and from people he played in games. He still kept up with Waya and Isumi quiet frequently, and he always spent at least one day a week with Akari to just go out normally. Sometimes even Kaga 'blessed' him with his presence, and they went out for Soba or Ramen. Akira was steadfastly becoming a daily basis in his life too, they occasionally had games, but after the fiasco in the Go Tournament, Akira seemed a bit…disappointed.

But all in all, Hikaru's life was very good, as he began his life as a pro.

It wasn't until Sai had confessed something rather big, that Hikaru suddenly found his life thrown out of its comfortable routine.

"_Hikaru I…" Sai began, his voice trailing off into the abyss of his mind._

_Hikaru blinked, looking up from the kifu he was studying in his room. "Ah? What's wrong Sai?"_

"_I really have to tell you something, Hikaru." Sai began slowly, and softly, his voice a mere whisper._

"_Huh?" Hikaru's attention slowly shifted as he set the kifu down and furrowed his brows. "What?"_

"_Well actually…" Sai struggled for words. "I-well-I'm not really a…well…a ghost you see."_

_Silence enveloped as Sai waited for Hikaru to reply. The boy scanned the room, as if finding comfort in the normality that had surrounded him since he was young. The drawers untidy and filled with his clothing a sock hanging out the third drawer and flopping with the fan in his room, the smell of his laundry detergent and the natural smell of his room, the Goban sitting patiently in the corner next to the go ke. The kifu he had so precariously dropped on the floor. But most importantly, himself, for the fact that he himself was very real…but at this information, may or may not be very normal._

"_If you're not a ghost…" Hikaru began quietly. "Then what are you?"_

_Sai stuttered for a moment. "I…I'm not very sure, Hikaru."_

_That was a first. In almost anything, Sai had some sort of input. Go especially, with his seemingly mastery of the game, it's history, and anything that had anything to do with go. And even things like social situations, etiquette, soccer, what to say to Akari, hold the door for people, polite ways to say thank you. Sai always seemed to have _something _that could help Hikaru in every given situation. But now, as they sat in silence in his room, no helpful advice was given._

"…_Hikaru?"_

"_So like," Hikaru stared at his window in a melancholy somber. "I have schizophrenia or something?"_

_If anything, Sai's voice seemed sad and, comforting. "Not like that."_

"_Well then what?" Hikaru felt his voice rising. "I'm almost completely insane or have some sort of split personality?! I'm hearing a voice in my head that I have no idea even is _real _or not because all I can do is hear you, and I don't even know if I'm sane anymore?"_

"_I'm sorry." Sai said, his voice filled with worry and haste. "I can't give you an answer…because only you can. I don't understand anything about this either…but I enjoy whatever it is. It's not like I'm trying to destroy the world with a notebook as your alternate ego or anything."_

_Hikaru cracked a smile at the joke, and the Death Note reference. "I guess that is true."_

_But the silence weighed heavy, and Sai knew that it would take a lot more than one lame attempt at humor to cheer Hikaru up. _

Sai had told him on May 5th, and Hikaru had almost stopped playing Go forever.

But now, after finally getting over the fact that yes, he had a voice in his head, and no, it wasn't that horrible, he had another problem. Getting over Sai was hard enough, keeping Sai a secret was even harder—especially with the fact that IP addresses could now be traced—but this problem, this was a problem even bigger than anything he had faced before.

He new he had promised Touya some sort of answer, but he didn't know really how to say it.

And he also knew that Akira wanted some answers.

Sai almost always made comments when he played games, of course, there were the games that the split himself played—like his game against Touya Koyo, in which he was speaking numbers quite frequently, even if Hikaru was the only actual person that could hear him—but he also did it easily. He'd make comments about how they played, better moves, helpfully tidbits, even better ways to reach Yose, usually he waited courteously until the end to make and suggestions, but sometimes he just blurted the answers out or the solving of a life or death problem immediately as he spotted them.

And usually, Hikaru didn't really mind, until the day he played Akira at the salon.

Hikaru had run out of options, after this last hand of his-unless he could turn the game around-he would lose to Akira by at the very least two moku.

Suddenly, Sai had spit out the answer. "6-11"

Hikaru wasn't thinking, and had played the move.

And Akira had seen it immediately. The utter 'Sai' of the move was enough for the boy's eyes to sharpen to Hikaru's, snapping from the board so quickly it was almost audible. Hikaru gulped uneasily as Akira's vibrant turquoise eyes bore into his green ones, and he wasn't sure what he could make out of it. Truthfully, Akira was ready to cut the game off and just begin verbally interrogating Hikaru, but that wasn't how it worked. And so, Akira continued the game, but at the end, gave Hikaru a stony look that said 'I want to know.'

Which lead to the incident maybe a week ago.

Hikaru had just learned that, he was going to play Akira in an official match the coming week, and was rather confused on how to make of it. They had been practicing more and more with each other as the time until the Hokuto Cup dwindled away, and it was obvious this would be a hard game.

He wasn't sure if Akira had known this information or not.

"Hikaru." The boy with bleached hair wasn't entirely sure if they were on first name basis yet, but it hadn't occurred to think this at the time.

As Akira stormed into the hallway Hikaru was drinking Coke in, he looked as if he had been stewing over one of Hikaru's very 'Sai' like games. Even said 'ex-Ghost' had noted that he looked a bit angry and frustrated at Hikaru.

"Huh—

"Who is Sai?"

Well, Akira never really claimed to be subtle.

"What?" Hikaru sputtered. He hadn't thought Akira would be so forth coming about the question. Touya may not be the kind to dance around the subject idly, but even that was a bit blunt for the boy. "Why…" Hikaru began slowly, nursing his drink. "Do you want to know?"

"Your games." Akira said quickly. "All of them. Even the one that you played pitifully with me in the Tournament, they are all connected to Sai's games. And even know, that move you played…the ones you always seem to play. It's so…Sai."

Hikaru didn't know what to make of that. "Well…you obviously know I have some sort of connection to Sai."

Akira nodded. Of course. Just about everyone could accomplish that knowledge. "But…what exactly is your connection is what I want to know."

"And that's what I can't tell you." Hikaru smiled sadly, and walked out then, leaving Akira sputtering and furious, but the other boy hadn't said anything.

…

And right now, as they were going to play their real first official match with each other as pros.

…

Hikaru hadn't voiced any of his worries to Sai yet, his other half seemed placental and rather quiet during these whole turn of events. But, his other half was content with the many requests he got from pros on the internet, and enjoyed his match with Touya Meijin on the internet quite immensely. And Hikaru didn't want to disrupt the other's rather good mood with his gloomy thoughts. Who was Akira really chasing? And who was really Akira's rival? It was painfully obvious who was better, Sai or Hikaru, even if the two played every single night.

And who did Akira believe-whether subconsciously or not-was really his rival? Or, more importantly, who was worthy of such a title?

Hikaru had been stirring on these thoughts just as much as Akira had been sniffing around for more clues of Sai. Whenever he watched the list of watchers when Sai played on the internet, he always found the name titled, 'Akira' on the list. Whenever he played a rather unconventional move, whether of Sai's origin or his own, he could tell that Akira wanted to know how this move was found, and who created it. Everything about Hikaru was also about Sai, and Sai was the mystery that Akira was currently chasing.

And as Hikaru stood outside the game room, he wondered these questions, and these theories.

It was getting close to game time, and as Sai babbled on about some new moves and ideas he was thinking of, Hikaru had moved away from the wall he was leaning on to find Akira.

Said Touya was talking to one of the many Go Magazine interviewers, this one just happening to be Go Weekly. There was actually quiet a crowd, probably because it was a Touya-Shindou game, in which everyone liked to watch because they were the two rival genius pros. He had already seen the Meijin, his friends, Ogata Juudan, Kuwabara, Oza, and other title holders who had come to watch their first official game. And now, the magazines were grabbing a hold too.

"Is it true you consider Shindou Hikaru your rival?" One reporter asked.

"Of course." Akira answered easily, as if it was plain as day. "He is the only one who I believe can match me perfectly."

Hikaru glowered even more as he heard Akira speak those words. As if…they weren't truly spoken about him, but about Sai.

"Akira." He spoke up, and the pro turned in surprise, as did most of the reporters. Cameras flashed in blinding lights, as they scurried over to Shindou.

"And what about you, Shindou-san. Do you consider Touya-san your rival?" One fluttery lady asked him.

"Yeah of course." Hikaru said flippantly, the tone of dismissal rather evident in his voice.

He didn't feel like causing more of a scene, so he made a motion to Akira to the hallway that was deserted rather close to where they were, and he walked over there ahead. Akira pleasantly talked a little more to the reporters, about rather shallow things, like what he thought of his father's early retirement, about the new world of Go, and the 'new wave' of players entering the world of Go. Afterwards, he made his way to the hallway his rival had motioned to.

Hikaru was leaning solemnly against the wall, his eyes were a mix of many emotions, the light from the window nearby painted the floor in long strokes.

Hikaru looked up as he walked into the hallway, his eyes sparkling in the light that caught it and his hair bleeding gold at the edges in the sunlight.

Akira blinked, but he recovered from his awe rather easily. "Is there…something you wanted to speak to me about?"

Hikaru snorted at his cordial way of opening conversation, but didn't extend further. "Yeah, actually."

Akira raised a brow.

"I have to ask you something…kinda important."

"Oh?" Akira would be lying if he said he wasn't interested, he watched as the light flickered with the sway of the blinds, how Hikaru's eyes seemed to glow green, and as the light moved they turned into an ocean blue. How his hair—even the black—was bleeding gold in the sunlight that shimmered over him in a peachy hue.

Akira blinked. His eyes. They were blue. But then, just as quickly as they changed, they were back to the green he was so used to.

"Who do you want to play?" Hikaru's voice came out strong, and perilous.

Akira was taken aback by the suddenness of when he spoke.

"Who do you want to play?" Hikaru repeated, never braking eye contact. "Me…or Sai?"

"W-What?" Akira didn't understand, and resisted the urge to scream in frustration and the overwhelming curiosity he had at the moment. Hikaru was offering a choice that…he didn't know what to do with.

"Well?"

Well, he had been playing Hikaru for a long time now…and he was just begging for another chance…

"Sai."

Akira was too busy noticing how his once green eyes that sparkled like emeralds, had turned into a deep delphinium blue, like the point where the sky met the ocean, to notice the pain that had ended the existing of green in those eyes.

"Ahh." Was his only response, before Hikaru—or Sai—pushed past him and into the game room.

…

Needless to say, Akira didn't understand much, but he followed suit anyways.

And in front of those all seeing azure eyes, that looked so eerie—and Akira had thoroughly convinced himself that it was just a trick of light—on Hikaru's face, Akira sat on the other side of a wooden Goban. The silent intensity, but more importantly the anger in them, was what Akira really didn't understand. Of course, he didn't know that, Hikaru was too shocked and dismayed with his answer that he had clamored into the hollow abyss of the recesses of his mind, and it was now Sai who sat across the Goban from him, upset with him for the fact he had hurt his other half.

And, also in front of all these people, was he thoroughly slaughtered.

Pa-chi.

The game had progressed in a fiery descent into defeat, in which Akira could do nothing but try to hold on in the midst of a great storm, of which he already knew the outcome. He was also intrigued with the fact that it was Hikaru—even though with those blue, blue eyes it didn't seem like Hikaru in the slightest—that had done such a thorough defeat of him.

But then he remembered, Hikaru's words before the slaughter match.

"_Who do you want to play, me or Sai?"_

This wasn't Hikaru. This was Sai.

--

_So? Review? :3_


	2. i'm drinking too much i'm on my way to

_Haa...English isn't my frist language. But I hope I'm soing decent with it. This is a slow and fast paced story regarding the relationships that Hikaru has in his life. Its going to follow the whole Hokuto Cup though probably. _

_((this is like a page break)) But most italics are flashbacks and thoughts. _

_--_

The room had fallen into a tense silence.

Hikaru sat numbly in the tranquil backdrop of his mindscape, it was very peaceful. With the only noise the sound of dripping water, the only sight pure sallow abyss, Hikaru found himself soothing into the feel of it. So this was where Sai spent his life. He couldn't see anything—hadn't gotten used to the feeling of being trapped in his own mind—but he figured he'd be able to soon. It felt nice though, no worries, no problems, just a soft lulling world of nothingness.

He wondered though, as he closed his eyes and listened to another beat of water, what was going on outside.

The game room—filled with observers shoving and pushing—had fallen into a silence that could only be caused by the world's greatest amateur player finally coming out of the cyberspace recesses and into the world of the professionals. Sai's eyes, the only true part that wasn't the same as Hikaru's had an aloof calmness as he noticed this silence. The man wasn't very interested in anything else besides protecting Hikaru at this point.

Akira stared at the board numbly.

The black and white had meshed together into a swirl of defeat, and the boy knew he had been slaughtered. But he should have known-should _have_-what Hikaru meant. What this must mean.

And still, he couldn't believe it.

The strength of Sai, the sheer confidence in each move that could only come from the greatest player of them all, the one closest to achieving the hand of god. Every attack he made was smacked away and every futile attempt he tried Sai always had something better, always a step ahead. Akira couldn't comprehend how anyone could be so strong, but he lamented that he'd be able to study this game for a long time.

The tension that had cobwebbed over their heads, slowly at first as tendrils of silence swirled from out of the darkness in the room, before it had encased them in a stretched pause, had kept its vigil.

Even as Sai very calmly and slowly got up, after the mandatory thanking, no one said a word. The aura that surrounded Hikaru—but Akira wasn't sure if he could even call the boy in front of him just that anymore—was enough to keep everyone spell bound in a casket of fear and anxiety. The strongest of Go players, his father, Ogata, Kuwabara, Oza, and many 9-Dans who had come mainly for him, but now were strongly interested in Hikaru, had kept silent as the boy walked out of the room.

Nothing was heard but the soft padding of an aloof and confident man heading out of the room.

When Sai left, and the icy cool that had encased the room slowly dissipated, did the room begin to swelter with conversation.

_The move right there—_

_That kosumi—_

_And the Ten gen—_

_Shuusaku—?_

Akira felt parts of the conversation sweep through his ears before carrying on with the draft in the room. But he only continued to stare. He couldn't hear anything from the ringing in his ears, the sound of the go stones that had been played moments ago.

Ogata snarled furiously, more or less because of Kuwabara's howl of laughter at the other man's antics, and he snatched his cigarettes from his suit and busily made his way out of the room. He'd have to find that brat later, nicotine first. The Meijin stared at the board in a mix of both interest and fear. Interest, in that finally his rival had shown itself, and that he would finally be able to play an even match with someone else. But fear, because he knew that even with his countless years of wisdom could he even hope to defeat a man of this caliber and strength.

Waya tried to understand—to wrap the thought of this was Shindou, who was also apparently _Sai_—as he watched Akira's unmoving form in front of the Goban. Somehow, the red-head realized that this wasn't exactly Hikaru, but it wasn't exactly Sai either. It was both of them, but then, also in some utterly weird way, it wasn't. They were one, and they were two. Somehow, Waya felt more understanding in that half-assed explanation he had then to the fact that Hikaru was actually Sai, which was the current favorite of the room.

The reporters that had come to watch what was supposed to be the best and most even match of the season, were even more interested in the massacre that Shindou had made of Touya, even though the reporters themselves hadn't quite noticed it was Sai as easily as the Go players did. In fact, they had to ask around to even get that gossip.

It didn't take an idiot, all it took was a decent understanding of Go and Sai to know who had just destroyed Akira. And that wasn't Hikaru.

((before you ask which way to go))

Hikaru had finally taken the reins of his mind when Sai had promised-and Sai never really lied. Ever.-that they were far, far away from anything Go related. In fact, Sai had taken him to the very remote and peaceful place of his house, and he was actually, when he came to, staring at his bedroom ceiling in one of his favorite positions. With his hands behind his back and cradling his head.

"Thanks." He said softly to his split.

"Of course." Sai answered back easily.

Hikaru's eyes traced the patterns on his ceiling. "So how did it go?"

"I…" Sai trailed off. He only really did it when he wanted to tell him something meaningful but couldn't find the words. "I couldn't stand how hurt you were. So I made sure that Touya didn't stand a chance."

Hikaru sat up quickly. "What?"

"Well, you seemed so upset—

"No not that." Hikaru said hurriedly. "But you beat Touya?"

"Of course." Sai sounded affronted. "You think I wouldn't have?"

Hikaru blinked. "No, no. I mean…well, how many moku did you beat him by?"

"Too many to count."

"Sai!"

"What?" His other half said, worried. "I was mad at him, and I'd never go easy on someone!"

"But Sai, now everyone's going to think that I'm you! And they're going to ask for games, and demand answers, and I'm not just going to be able to be like, 'oh yeah, Sai's my alternate ego, isn't that cool' and make it all better!" Hikaru whined, throwing his hands over his head and flopping onto his pillow.

"I'm sorrrryy!" Sai cried. "I didn't mean to make a problem! I was just…really mad that Touya said me. Instead of you…" His voice trailed off.

"Yeah I know." Hikaru muttered glumly.

The next few days were spent in earnest, and pretty much Go free, aside from the passing glances Hikaru gave his go board before he sped off to do other things. Luckily, Akari nor Mitani read Go Weekly like a bible-and Hikaru could name quite a few who did-and he met up with them without any pestering from anxious professionals or festering reporters. Maybe, if he stayed away for a while, he'd be able to sort out his thoughts on what to do with his know rather shattered rivalry with Akira, and how to diffuse a situation that was constantly becoming worse.

"Sun?" Akari guessed, between the popsicle in her mouth.

"Nope."

"Slide."

"No."

Mitani groaned. "Uh…sandal?"

"Nope." Hikaru's grin widened.

"Summer?"

"Its Spring, idiot."

Mitani growled at the insult.

"I give up!" Akari adjusted her mega-large sunglasses with crossing C's-Chanel, or something-on them. She claimed they were in style, but Hikaru pointedly said they made her look she had bug eyes.

"Sand." Hikaru answered triumphantly, pointing below them to where a little boy in shorts and his sister in a little pink dress played in a sand box in the park.

"Gah." Mitani frowned. "Throw me a popsicle, Shindou."

Hikaru reached around in the bag below his beach chair, wedged his fingers around sun tan lotion and water bottles until he got a popsicle. He threw it at Mitani, who caught it with his eyes closed.

It had originally been Akari's idea. Ever since the turn of their high school year-or hers and Mitani's at least-she'd become less and less sporty chic and more into the normal standard high school girl. i.e. skimpy bathing suits, five inch heals, and designer sunglasses, which explained her current attire. Hikaru was sure Mitani wasn't complaining though.

They were currently sunning themselves on a prominent building top of an apartment building owned by Akari's father's good friend, not too far from a kiddie park, hence the boy and his sister playing in the sand box, and the massive playground and the sound of screaming kids over Akari's favorite singer, Gackt. She'd dragged the two along, saying they needed more quality time with the three of them now that Akari and Mitani had different classes (turns out someone really _was _smarter that Akari) and Hikaru was a Go pro.

This also explained Akari's very small pink bathing suit, 'Juicy Couture!' she had spat indignantly at him when he asked her what kind of career she was going for when she grew up, the reason that Hikaru was now working on the best tan of his life, and why they snickered at Mitani's own tan.

"I was pretty sure you were an albino with your hair dyed." Hikaru had said jokingly as they flopped onto their beach chairs, and he was hit with a lotion bottle.

Sai had been relatively quiet during most of the time he had spent with his normal un-Go friends, and Hikaru wondered if it was because his half was sleeping. That was, if split personalities even needed to sleep the way humans did. Hikaru would have to ask him that later. He brushed his newly bleached bangs out of his eyes, Akari had done it for him, she claimed his roots were already showing, and that he was in need of a new dye. Hikaru had long since learned to question a girl on fashion.

He heard something over the racket that Akari called 'redemption' or something, and clamored up from his comfortable sunning position, and took a look at his fellow tanners.

They were also relaxing.

He got off his chair just as the other Akari opened her eyes to see what Hikaru was doing, and watched him lean over the buildings railing.

"Akari, turn that crap down!" He hissed at her, and, she decided that whatever he was doing was interesting enough to miss the chorus of one of her favorite Gackt songs.

"What's up Tsuitsui?" He called down to the boy adjusting his glasses.

Tsuitsui tried not to squint in the sun's glare. "Hi Hikaru-kun! Is Akari-chan there?"

"Yeah." Hikaru nodded, leaning over to look at Akari. "Tsuitsui wants you."

She pushed her sunglasses up, as Hikaru sat back down and leaned over. They had a conversation Hikaru didn't pay attention to and then she started packing up all her stuff. Hikaru watched with interest, sending a silent thank you that she had shut off her music. Mitani had finally moved from his comatose state lathered in SPF 75, and also watched apathetically.

"So?" Hikaru ran a hand through his hair.

"Tsuitsui needs me over at the Go club." Akari told him as she picked up all her stuff from the rooftop.

"Ah." Mitani began to pack up his stuff to.

"Hey!" Hikaru looked affronted. "Why are you leaving?"

"If Akari needs to go to the club, I need to go too." Mitani said patiently, as if he was talking to a slow dim-witted child. "And plus, it looks gay if two guys sun themselves together."

"True." The latter seemed to make more sense to Hikaru than the former.

"See you Thursday?" Akari called back, hopefully.

Hikaru nodded. "I'll text you if I can't make it."

((remember where you've been))

After admiring his new amazing and very natural tan, and getting compliments by it from his mother—who swooned, saying that she finally hoped she'd have grandkids—and by various girls in the neighborhood, Hikaru made his way back to his room, and back to his life of Go. At first, he considered ignoring the various kifu that he had of Shuusaku (Sai's favorite player, of which was the reason that Sai was so good at playing like him, but it may be because Hikaru created him to do so subconsciously) and his Goban, but it didn't work as well as he thought.

Karma worked in off ways, and first he tripped over a stone, then one of his Kifu's fell, and he had to re adjust it, and finally a book of various kifu fell out of his bookshelf amongst his Shaman King manga, and he decided that enough was enough.

Hikaru groaned, and looked up from his TV screen. He took one last look at his losing battle to Sephiroth on his Final Fantasy VII, and now vintage PS2, and decided that he'd find another day to complete the game.

He picked up the book of kifu, the pages worn and yellowed, sticking out at odd angles because it was pretty much a scrapbook of kifu he had.

One fell out, and he looked around the mess of Naruto and Bleach manga to find it.

He blinked. It was one of Akira's games.

Back when he was still very obsessed with chasing Akira, back when the only thing that mattered was their intense rivalry and equally intense goal to beat each other, and nothing else had phased him but catching up to the boy who had inspired him to be a pro. Of course, he wasn't very sure if that all still mattered to the same degree it had before, because apparently he wasn't really Akira's rival at all.

In retrospect, he had done all the chasing of Akira. Akira only chased Sai, under the void of Hikaru.

Sai noticed his somber mood, and moved to cheer him up. "Ne, ne Hikaru! Why don't we play Kingdom Hearts? We still haven't gotten past the Pinocchio world (AN: Has anyone else _ever _beaten that level?!) and I want to see what happens with Riku and Kairi—

The ex-Ghost now his split personality slowed his speech, as he realized it clearly wasn't working.

Hikaru…

Sai vowed he'd make Akira somehow understand this situation.

Somewhere however, Akira sneezed, and Ichikawa became very upset. Somehow, she didn't think he was actually very upset at losing so badly at all. Even though he played the game over and over, backwards and side ways and so many other which ways that she didn't know existed in go, just like he did with their first game, he didn't seem withheld in the same fiery determination.

If anything, he looked solemn, and a tad melancholy.

She set the steaming tea down with a worried frown, and was about to begin pattering on about how he should at _least _eat something, when she noticed that he probably wouldn't pay attention to her at all.

Sighing, she let him be.

Akira however, had his own mesh of thoughts and questions, stirring together in his head until all of them clearly became one. Who was Sai and who was Hikaru? There was a fine line between the two of them, if their level of skill was anything to go by, and then there was the fact that they were somehow one and the same. Akira really couldn't understand it, the way they were both different and alike at the same time in so many ways that it made his head spin and his fingers shift nervously.

Sai was like Shuusaku down to every single letter. It was as if Shuusaku was just simply cloned and created into another person, except this person new all the modern techniques and plays, and had the ability to morph every single game into his own. It was a scary thought, to grow substantially after a loss of a win, a bit like virus' nowadays, where they always seem to get worse and worse the more we get new medicine.

And then there was Hikaru, so unconventional and unique and nothing like the cold and tantalizing way that Sai played. Sai didn't play around, he crushed and murdered without a second thought and didn't care for anything but the game. But Hikaru liked to switch around and tease, throw bait out and lure if nothing more than the fun of it all. There was more emotion in Hikaru's playing then in Sai's.

So Akira couldn't quite figure out what was the truth and what wasn't, and how the line between Hikaru and Sai was there, and then it wasn't.

It was after a week did Hikaru finally come back to the world of Go.

Actually, it wasn't even by choice, Akari had heard in passing, from Tsuitsui, who heard from his grandfather, who heard from his dentist, who heard from her good friend, that Hikaru had totally slaughtered Akira. Of course, word of mouth mixed many things up, but the same message was clear. Hikaru beat Akira, and was thought to be Sai. And he couldn't really get away from the way Akari pushed her face into his and demanded, or the way she dragged Mitani along for extra measure.

So now, he stood slowly and-as if he had been dragged along the dirt to where he was-took of his shoes and put them in the shoe holder not too far from the elevator, already hearing demanding voices as people flocked to the secretary, who haphazardly told them that yes, Shindou Hikaru was in the building.

Luckily, or not so luckily for dear Hikaru, it was Akira who saw him first, and had quietly suggested they find a secluded hallway to talk before he got mobbed.

He steadfastly agreed.

--

_Yeah? Review? Our first Hikaru Akira encounter is next! (and it will go faster if you review) :3_


	3. strikinout go to sleep with the pressure

_Well...I updated fast mainly because I was in hotel in Quebec and it was faster. But I'm back in the US. Actually, I wrote this in the airport :)_

_--_

For almost the entire time since his thorough defeat, Akira was very sure he was going to have a talk with Shindou—why didn't you say this before? Why play like an idiot for so long? Why throw that Tournament match (he was still testy about that) when he could play like _this_? It was too overwhelming for the Meijin's son, who had grown up always having to play his best. Losing was never an option he would have considered, especially throwing a match. So many times. It was unheard of.

At least, not anymore. Because Hikaru had done it.

But he tried not to think about that as he met Hikaru's eyes.

It was darker in this hallway then the last they had met in. Hikaru looked gloomy almost; the melancholy was painted in his face, his eyes. Intense-eyed and fragile-faced and looked as if he was preternaturally quiet, he wonder who made the error of judgment that he could yell. And shout and throw go stones at him. It was such a contrast.

Awash in the cold, wan spill of the florescent lights above them.

"So?"

Akira blinked. That's right. Wasn't he going to say something?

His eyes were big and luminous, supernatural.

"So why would you do that?"

"Do what—

"Throw all those matches!" He cut him off fiercely. Hikaru blinked, at first owlishly, and then a little faster, as if he got the meaning seconds later.

"Oh. That."

Akira would have groaned in frustration. Whatever confident and over powering Hikaru was here only moments before had vanished into the one he saw nearly every other day. It was odd…that Hikaru seemed different. He wondered what kind of game Hikaru would play today.

"What do you meant _just_ 'oh. That.' Shindou! You have any idea how _rude _it is to purposely throw matches like that—

"Whoa!" Hikaru stopped him short, and lowered his voice with a cautious look around the deserted hallway. "I didn't throw any matches."

"Then what?" Touya snapped irritably. He wasn't in the mood for the wonderful goose chases that Hikaru liked to throw everyone on.

The boy gulped. Sai cheered, "Go Hikaru! Go!" In the worst attempt at a Dora the Explorer chant Hikaru had ever heard, he felt his face heating up and heard himself sputtering, because there was no way he could actually put this into words. Without Touya looking at him like a complete insane psychopath who was going to come at him with a notebook that could kill people.

And, the only real way to do that—as he had taken from Sai's rather endearing but equally annoying chants—was by Go.

"Well…" He began in the strongest voice he could muster. "I have…two different kinds of Go in me. And its not like I can really…well, _tell _when I'm going to play one hand or the other, because I can't really—uh—control that…transition." He faltered for words at the end.

The light did a small flicker above them. Hikaru found his hands behind his back instinctively tighten, and he watched Akira's face with as much concentration he could while still looking as nonchalant as possible. His face hadn't shown any true…meaning that he had actually digested the words Hikaru had not-so-wanted to tell him, and, in fact his face was pensive. And Hikaru wasn't sure if that was good or bad at this point.

"I…_think _I understand." Akira said finally. "I mean, well, could I see your…other hand play?"

"Huh?"

"Well I know how you play already." His rival elaborated. "And, aside from the internet games, I really haven't seen how the other hand plays, and I want to see the difference between the two."

"Uhm." Was about as far as a formed answer Hikaru could make.

He heard the faint sounds of camera men running on the tiled floors, and the distinct shouts of 'Waya-san!' and 'Your friend Hikaru' and it really didn't take much more than that for Hikaru to realize it was about the time to leave. He didn't really want to look at Akira again, still a bit upset over his rather blatant, 'my rival is Sai' which was pretty much the underlying statement at this point.

Especially now. Why _else _would he want to watch Sai play? It didn't make sense if he didn't.

"Oh…Hikaru." Sai flustered about in his mind. "Do you…want me to play?"

"What does it matter anymore?" Hikaru grumbled miserably. "Do whatever you want."

As Sai felt himself being pulled forward, and blinking a bit as his eyes adjusted to the light, he wondered what Hikaru meant by that. He supposed while he was out, he could at least try to fix a few things. Waya blinked as he looked up from the hordes of reporters vying for his attention. As soon as he looked, so did the rest of the reporters, gathering around with the backdrop of flashing cameras around them.

Sai was composed though, answering no questions and heading straight into the game room, where he played a relatively push-over 6-Dan. Even though Hikaru was only a 2-Dan. Akira followed behind closely.

Anyone could tell that there was something different about the way Hikaru played. He wasn't the same as he was when they always played.

And Akira tried to wrap it around his head.

That Hikaru who, in the beginning, had opened his eyes to the _real_ world of Go—not the one with his father and Ogata, but the one with the ultimate player, Sai—and then, just as abruptly, began to play like someone who had never held a Go stone in his life. And the internet, and when he came to visit his father, and just after that did his father lose to Sai, it didn't make sense.

Now, he watched Hikaru completely dominate the field.

The 6-Dan didn't stand a chance. Hikaru toyed around and teased in a cynical manner. He'd let the other player think he was winning, and then crush his hopes with a crushing move. He didn't even look like he was paying attention at all, watching the clock more often then watching the game. Akira nearly growled. How could someone be that strong? Even though he was a bit meek, Tachibana 6-Dan was decently good, and actually rather strong.

But the way Hikaru was playing now. He doubted even Ogata could stand against him.

Watching him, Akira frowned. Why would he hide his talent like that? Why would he constantly let him win-yelling and screaming because of his loss-when he could have easily dominated him like this? It didn't make any sense, but the more he thought the more he came to a conclusion.

"_Who do you want to play?"_

"…_I can't really—uh—control that…transition…"_

"_Me or Sai?"_

The more he thought, the more Hikaru's words sounded like he was talking about another person, not himself.

At first, Akira was sure that Hikaru meant when he said 'Sai', was him playing at his highest strength, and he was just calling it Sai for reasons unknown. But the more he thought, the more he noticed that Hikaru didn't talk like Sai was him, but someone else. And that didn't make sense, because if Hikaru could play as Sai, then he _must _be Sai.

But then his words couldn't make sense.

Akira blinked, eyes widening in a realization that he had been waiting to conclude to.

"_I have two different kinds of Go in me—"_

Sai was more than just Hikaru. Sai was a whole other _person_.

Akira frantically watched the game, watched the plays that Sai made-plays Hikaru would never do-and watched him toy mercilessly with his opponent, sardonic and sadistic. This wasn't Hikaru at all, the person who defeated him wasn't Hikaru. This had to be Sai.

Maybe, Hikaru was both himself and Sai, without actually being _both _of the them at the same time?

It was a hard thought.

"I resign."

The 6-Dan lowered his head over the board in defeat, hands clenched on his knees. Hikaru—or Sai—sat perfectly still, only a slight inclination of his head that he heard the man. "Thank you for the game." He said mandatorily, his face a blank mask. This couldn't be Hikaru.

And then, with no real interest in going over the game, Sai stood up and walked out of the room, silently and confidently in the same manner he did to Akira.

But this time, the young Touya trailed after him before the press could.

Sai moved briskly, running a hand through the blond parts of his hair. He walked elegantly, without the usual boyish gait like Hikaru did, or the slight slouching. If anything, it was like an entire different person that wasn't Hikaru at all. Which only fueled Akira's theory.

"Shindou!"

The boy stilled, before turning around slowly. Those blue eyes regarded him with a calm look in them, bright and intense and very blue.

"Touya." Even his voice was very slow and elegant, almost musical.

"What do you mean by that?" He asked, listening closely to the footsteps of many people getting closer. "What you said before." He elaborated.

Hikaru looked as if he was going to say something, but the flashing of lights cut him off. The press had caught up to him, Amano and his crew already swinging their microphones and note pads into their faces in an alarming rate. Akira blinked, he hadn't realized they were so close and was caught in surprise, but Sai had this calm demeanor that seemed to make him unable to ever be caught off guard.

"Could you explain what this sudden streak of newfound power came about?"

"And what it does to your rivalry?"

"Where did you learn this Go?"

Sai watched them with disinterested eyes, before he met Akira's. In a way that was very Hikaru-like, he mouthed something to the young Touya, who caught it quickly. And then, he walked off, leaving many baffled reporters and even more baffled Touya, left to deal with the hordes of press. It was silent as Sai left, and no one said anything to bring him back. And then, the ruckus started up as they began to interrogate Akira.

The boy sighed.

((before you ask which way to go))

Ichikawa slowly poured the tea into a customer's cup, the old man looked up from his game with a warm smile and thanked her. She bowed politely in return. The two old men weren't the only ones in the salon today. A lot of the regulars had come, a usual occurrence in the daily stretch of things, and a few new comers and-really-just a whole bunch of old men.

But her eyes slowly sent a sideways glance to the boy sitting in the backroom, awash in the wan, wintry spill of the florescent lights and the blues that met off of the plants.

Hikaru usual came in with Akira. And he usually came so late that the young master was already upset and furious, and they played a harsh and reckless game, and then yelled and shouted about. Which ended up with Hikaru leaving and Akira screaming to the point that all the customers got very used to it, and if they didn't, they would soon enough. Only true patrons could see this usual occurrence, but when it happened, it was very loud, and impossible to be ignored.

Now, the boy was intense-eyed and staring at the board with a look that was too old for his age.

Ichikawa sighed, and wondered what happened this time.

The salon doors opened in a smooth motion, and she smiled as she noticed the hair that could only be Akira coming in. He didn't look happy in the least, but not furious, in the way he almost always was when it came to Shindou. Instead, he had that same intense-eyed look that Shindou had, but a mix of confusion swirled along with it. He sent her a polite smile which she returned, before his eyes caught Shindou and he walked briskly to the back room.

"Oh no." One customer murmured. "Here we go again."

Ichikawa placed a delicate finger to her lips in thought. "I don't know, they seem a little…different today."

Akira plopped into the seat facing Hikaru, noticed with a rather disdain that the other boy didn't look at him at all, in a way that seemed entirely like the first two they played. He was staring at the board in very hard thought, and it was beginning to annoy Akira as he realized his opponent wasn't looking at him at all. Very un Hikaru-like.

"Nigiri?"

His eyes met the cool blue of Hikaru's now azure ones.

"Yes."

Seven.

Hikaru got black. Akira had white. It reminded him of their first games. Hikaru didn't look like he was going to give Akira a good match at all, but, Akira already knew from hindsight that he would.

What really surprised him though, was that Hikaru was talking, unusual when they played their games.

"How much do you know?"

Akira's mouth tightened grimly. He didn't know how to put it in words. "You…well. You're Hikaru. But you're not. You're also Sai. You two are one and the same, but then you're not."

Hikaru—or Sai as Akira realized very quickly—tapped his chin lightly with that fan he always had. "That's a very interesting way to put it."

"Then how would you put it?" Akira muttered scornfully, forgetting for a moment that this wasn't Hikaru at all.

"The only thing that Hikaru and I share is this body." Pa-chi. A very well timed Ten gen.

Akira dropped his stone. Not because of this brilliant move that could not have been placed by Hikaru, but because of the bluntness in his words. So Akira was right, Hikaru and Sai may look alike, but they were very different. Sai was elegant, graceful and calm. When he played it was so perfectly calculated that it was disastrous. Hikaru was very unconventional, and sometimes that came in handy and won him a great deal of moku, and other times he lost very badly.

Akira could see it now.

He tried to counter the brilliant move, but it wasn't working. "I…see."

"It's not very hard to understand once you see the difference in our Go." The boy said lightly, almost playfully. It was a side of Sai that was different then the one who mercilessly beat him.

Pa-chi.

Pa-chi.

The game progressed on, Akira trying to win back what he lost, but Sai wouldn't budge. Ever move he tried was perfectly countered or dodged. Sai must be able to read the game so far in, much farther than what he was capable of.

"You're very good." Akira said at last.

Sai nodded, a pout forming on his—Hikaru's—face. "If I really am, then I wonder…

Pa-chi.

Pa-chi.

"Why Hikaru only thinks of _you_ as a rival."

Akira looked up sharply, watching the rather sad face with wide eyes. Where was this going? The other boy in front of him had a very solemn look, sad and almost childish in the way he pouted about the information he shared. But he had a point. With this skill, a skill that could easily defeat any opponent strong or weak, why would Hikaru chase him?

Why not chase this boy in front of him?

Akira faltered. "I don't.."

"We used to be rivals." Sai said suddenly, and Akira felt rather small in comparison. "He used to only chase me. He only wanted to beat me. I liked it, it was fun teaching Hikaru to play, and watch him learn the game."

"But then suddenly, he stopped. And said that you were his rival." Those eyes…so eerie and blue and boring into his soul..

They blinked at him. Innocent at first glance, and the deeper meaning was cold and calculating, cut throat. Sai wasn't looking for a pity party, he was looking for..

"I want to know why." He placed a stone on the board. It effectively ended the game of cat and mouse that they were playing. "He only thinks of you. So show me."

--

_Pairing? Hmm...maybe. Probably not. But a definite maybe. But here's a solid yes: reviews make the chapters come quicker!_


	4. of everyone watchin waiting their yours

_Well, thank you for one of my reviewers for the KH tip. That took me a while…haha. But anyways, no pairings. _No_, not even Akari and Hikaru, their just really, really good friends. And if any of you have a best guy friend, you'll understand._

_Stay Awake is by All Time Low. And is the theme. Hence the chapter names as lyrics. _

--

Akira wasn't sure what Sai had meant when he said that he wanted him to 'show him'. But in the end, he had a sneaking suspicion that he didn't show Sai what the man had wanted at all, if the look on his face was anything to go by. He didn't seem upset, maybe vaguely disappointed in his performance, but that was to be expected. Sai could pretty much be the God of Go, and there really wasn't anyone who could live up to that sheer dominating strength that Sai had.

Not even his father. But maybe Hikaru?

Sai regarded Hikaru in a higher light then he did anyone else. Akira could tell in the way he spoke of him. Truthfully, Akira thought that Hikaru was definitely an amazing player, but not amazing enough-not like Sai. He did have lots of room to grow though, and he would only continue to get better the more games he played. However, Sai seemed to think of Hikaru as an equal—Sai, who crushed all his opponents mercilessly, who usually won by fifteen to twenty moku or more—and the only person who would be able to defeat him one day.

"I resign." He sighed, defeated. The black and white stones were a swirl of colors on the Goban, but everything pointed to black winning. Every move he made had a perfect counter.

"Thanks for the game." He didn't sound very thankful at all though.

However, Sai's eyes never left the Goban. Even as he said those words. It was as if he was searching for something, and Akira lowered his eyes as he realized what it was. He was trying to look for whatever Hikaru saw in him that made him his rival. But compared to this boy in front of him, he was nothing. He was just another mediocre player who couldn't stand up to Sai. Just one of the many, who reached for something great, but fell too short...

He was cut out of his musings by a twisted smile forming on the blue-eyed boy's face.

"You have potential."

Akira blinked.

"That's what Hikaru sees in you." Sai elaborated, already beginning to pick up the stones. "But Hikaru has potential too. He's only played for three years now, and I know he's always getting stronger."

The younger Touya listened to these words carefully, avoiding eye contact—he still couldn't get over how blue those eyes were, how _wrong _they looked on Hikaru—and picking up his Go stones instead.

"And one day," Plik. Plik. Sai's hands softly dropped stones into the Go Ke, and even then it was with grace. "He'll beat you, Touya."

Akira looked up, startled, and meeting the eyes he had desperately tried to avoid. They were creepy—disturbingly blue. Haunting.

"And we'll be rivals once again."

With that, held in the same elegance and grace he had come in with, Sai left the Go Salon.

((before you ask which way to go))

The next time he saw Sai he was chatting with Waya in a way that seemed downright weird, especially after what had happened. Of course it was Hikaru, he noticed shortly afterward, from the way his eyes sparkled emerald in the Go Institute's lighting, his mannerisms, and the way he scratched the back of his head sheepishly. They didn't speak, Hikaru merely walking past him with Isumi after Waya had left to get to his game. But truthfully, he didn't want to talk either.

He couldn't concentrate on his game.

Thankfully, it was only a relatively easy 4-Dan. He hadn't even bothered to remember the guy's name when he introduced himself, scared stiff and in awe of playing Touya Akira. But Touya wasn't paying any attention to the man who was stuttering and bowing, and now playing pitifully against him even when he wasn't concentrating on the game. He was too busy reviewing what he knew of Hikaru, and what he knew of Sai. Their contrasts; and their similarities.

Oddly-or maybe not so oddly- the only thing the two had in common was go.

Sai reminded him of his father, a bit. The way they held themselves in elegance and grace, they _were _the two strongest players in all of go. Sai was deadly and cutthroat. Akira was fairly sure-from the few internet games Sai played; and the games he had played personally-that Sai never spared mercy to anyone. Sai didn't seem to care for anyone's feelings, especially the way he easily cut through Akira, in both Go and mentality. Breaking people seemed to come naturally.

Hikaru was so different from his split. He was a caring people person, as seen from the many friends he had made on the road to becoming a pro. Although he didn't give wins away when playing in Go, he made sure to congratulate his opponent on a good game, even if they didn't win. It was his sincerity that made him different than Sai. His smiles and his laughter, and his ability to make friends so easily and smoothly.

"I—I resign." The 4-Dan in front of him muttered, and Akira blinked. He hadn't even noticed he was winning by so much.

"Thanks for the game." He smiled politely, and his opponent tried to mimic it, even if he was clearly upset by his poor performance.

Akira got up swiftly, trying to leave as quickly as possible to find Hikaru.

From the way the 3-Dan Hikaru was playing walked out of their game—with his head hung and a droop in his walk, eyes downcast to the floor in what only could have been a clear loss—Hikaru must have won his match with ease, but Akira was still wondering where the boy was. He watched the 3-Dan pass him glumly in the hallway, watching the man's sorrow filled form as he pressed the button for the elevator. He was so distraught, Akira wondered if it was Hikaru or Sai who had played that match.

"Yeah, okay…"

Akira swiveled around abruptly, seeing Hikaru and Isumi somewhere down the length of the hallway.

"See you later than, Isumi." Hikaru waved casually, even though he was facing away from Akira he could see.

"Shindou!" He called out, watching with intrigued eyes as Hikaru's form stiffened before turning around. Definitely Hikaru.

"Touya." He greeted, looking casual if it wasn't for the fact his eyes spoke nervousness.

Akira looked around the hallway. No one was there. "I want to speak to him."

"Eh?" Hikaru blinked in surprise before he understood. 'Touya…I don't—

"Hikaru-kun!"

The two of them jumped, startled. They turned around to see Akari walking up to them, her heels clacking against the tiled floor with soft clicks as she hurried over. She was pretty, with her hair down and straightened, framing her face, eyes smoky and lips shiny and pink. Even Hikaru had to admit it. She looked too dressed though, with her sparkling gold heels and sleek black dress, for the Go Institute, and as people filed into the once deserted hallway they stopped to stare. Akari didn't seem to mind though.

"Jeez…" She groaned. "You're not even dressed yet."

That's right! Since he missed their get together on Thursday she was making him take her out to some fancy restaurant. As friends of course, or Mitani may have his head on a platter.

Thank god for Akari, because now he didn't have to answer to Touya.

"Sorry." He smiled sheepishly. "I just got done with a game. It's not my fault."

Akari grumbled, and then looked at her matching gold watch, glossed lips forming into a pout and one hand on her hip. "Well, we're going to be late, so I'll drive you home and then you have to get dressed quickly!"

"You _drove_ here?" Hikaru's eyebrows shot up.

"Shh!" Apparently, Akari was not supposed to be driving.

Hikaru turned back to Touya, who was still a bit confused as to what was happening. "See ya, Touya."

He could barely nod.

Akari, as it turned to be, was an excellent driver for a fifteen year old that barely just got her permit. She followed the speed limit to perfection, remembered to turn on her signal when she turned, and she drove in a straight line, never swerving around like most new drivers (AN:I know this from experience X/) did. However, you'd think with her docile personality, she'd be the perfectly behaved young driver who would never hurt a soul on the road. That was apparently wrong.

Akari was a very, _very_, aggressive driver. As Hikaru just found out.

"Auugh! Flipping…Ugh…MOVE!" Honk. Hikaru tried his best to mesh himself into the seat. But it was futile. "It's a freakin' GREEN light! Why the fuck—

Hikaru whimpered, and grabbed harder onto his seatbelt. Akari floored the gas pedal.

"A-Akari-chan…" Hikaru stuttered. "Don't you think you should uh…slow down?"

Akari waved him-and his concerns-off with a flippant hand. "I'm a perfect driver Hikaru, I just don't like stupid people on the road."

"I can tell." He muttered lowly.

"Anyways," She shot a look at herself in the rearview mirror, checking to make sure her lip gloss was still in place. "We're almost there, we just take a turn on Mitarashi Street—

Brake. "Gah!" Hikaru jolted forward, but was caught by his seatbelt. "God Akari-chan who taught you how to drive?! A grandma?!"

"Shut up Hikaru, you don't bother the driver when she's driving." Akari hunched over the wheel, with perfect precision she flung them around a car parked in the intersection and pretty much nose dived into the next street.

The only think Hikaru could do was pray to God that he'd be saved.

Luckily, there was vale parking at the restaurant, so Hikaru didn't have to suffer through Akari…_parking_. He shivered subconsciously, and the lady who was taking their coats asked if he'd like to keep his. He shook his head with a smile and followed Akari and their hostess over to a secluded dining table set for two. Listening to the soft piano and chatter in the background, Hikaru wished Akari hadn't dragged him over to this fancy place like a dead rat.

"I'm you're only sense of normality these days." She had sighed. "Be lucky you have a friend like me."

_Whatever_. Hikaru grumbled to himself.

With a smile, the waitress placed down their menus, and as she walked away Hikaru whistled at the pricey menu.

"This place is expensive."

Akari only smiled. "You've got a job."

"And empty pockets." Hikaru grinned. He didn't mind though. Oteai matches and league matches actually filled his account a lot. Not to mention the teaching games.

Akari's chocolate eyes softened, and underneath the perfectly done expensive makeup Hikaru could see his friend worrying over him. She pursed her lips, and he glowered instinctively. He knew she was going to say something, and if there was anything he hated, it was when people worried about him. Guilt ate away at his stomach like a glutton, and he felt the need to melt into the nicely clothed table.

"Hikaru," She began, and he noticed it sounded familiarly like the 'Welcome to hell speech'. At least in his head. "I—we—are worried."

"We?" That was a bit unexpected.

"Me, you mother, Mitani-kun…" She elaborated. "Anyways, you just…you're not acting yourself lately. I know, I _know_, Go's your life—can't live without it—if what happened last year was anything to go by."

He cringed. She _had _to bring up May 5th, didn't she? Come one…that was personal, nothing to do with Go! Of course, if he told her why she'd probably think he was insane.

"But sometimes…" As the salad was placed on their table, she fiddled around with her crisp lettuce dipped in raspberry vinnagrette. "…sometimes I think that there's more to you than, this." She motioned to the way he was now.

He felt sweat start to form on his forehead. The room was getting hot. "What do you mean, 'this'?"

Her eyes softened. "Happy."

"Akari—

"No, no, I know. Everyone gets sad at some points. I mean though, is when you're depressed over something Go related and your mother is worried _sick_—she almost had the flu Hikaru!—over you and all you're thinking about is Go, and Touya-kun, and games. And sometimes, sometimes Hikaru, I think it's almost like there's a different person to you!" She smiled sadly. "When you're looking at the board and your eyes are steely, when you mercilessly defeat an opponent."

He froze. Watching her mocha accented eyes as they bore into his, probing, studying for anything to go by.

She waited.

He sighed. "What if…there is more? If there is another person?"

"Hikaru…" Luckily, Akari had been speaking metaphorically and she figured so was Hikaru. "Then that's okay. I just, want to make sure that you're still happy, and that you know that your mother and I worry for you. Even Mitani-kun! _Mitani-kun_."

They laughed treacherously at that. If said boy was here to see them he'd be in a furious rage, but it only fueled their laughter.

"Hikaru." Her smile was heartbreakingly beautiful. "Don't change."

((remember where you've been))

It was raining by the time Hikaru got there. It had been two days since his little so called 'date' with Akari, which ended up with him scared to death and vowing never to get in a car with her again and never miss another get together in his lifetime.. And also two days since he last spoke to Touya, not that he wanted to in the least though. Now, as he trudged down the sidewalk, he could only hope that silence held. If it was possible, he clutched his umbrella even more, watching the sky as the clouds rolled around in the deep blue sky, ashen and gray and angrily spouting water droplets.

Sai mulled around in his head, apparently awake from his sleep—or whatever it was called when they didn't speak to each other—and nervously moving. Hikaru hoped he enjoyed this, because he was doing this for his split. As he walked up the stairs to the front door, he knocked twice. His emerald eyes flickered, before they turned the same shade as where the sky met the ocean, a deep and tranquil delphinium blue.

The door opened and Touya Akiko, which Hikaru could only assume was Akira's mother, smiled at him.

"Can I help you—?"

"Shindou." Sai filled in with a charming smile. "Shindou Hikaru."

Akiko blushed and giggled, a bit like the way his mother did when Isumi was charming and polite. He and Waya never let the guy live it down, but now Hikaru realized that maybe Isumi and Sai shared the same trait, just Sai went about it with a more aloof manner than Isumi did. Sai strode through the house, after Akiko had patiently gave him directions to where the Meijin was.

He apparently was studying kifu, and wouldn't mind if Hikaru—Sai if it was technicalities—asked for a game. As his luck would have it, Akira wasn't here.

Sai knocked twice, before he silently slid the screen door.

The Meijin looked up, eying the confident stance that Hikaru was standing in and placed the Kifu down softly.

"Ah," He bowed his head politely. "Shindou-kun, what can I do for you?"

Sai returned the bow, but his eyes were steeled and intense. "I'd like to play a game."

As Sai walked to sit on the other side of the Goban, helping the Meijin clean up the unfinished game he was recreating from the Kifu, the Meijin eyed him wisely. Taking in how Hikaru now held himself…differently. It reminded him subtly of the intense pressure in the Yuugen no Ma. The way the boy's eyes—they were a deep blue, he noted and he almost remembered them being green—hardened in a mix of both confidence and concentration, a good blend for a player with his strength.

"Of course." Touya nodded.

"With no handicaps." Sai added, eyes never leaving the stones he cleaned up.

The elder man blinked, but did not say anything to oppose the request. If Hikaru wanted a game with no handicaps, then so be it.

The board was clean.

"Nigiri?"

--

_You should call me Mistress Cliffie. But until I get enough reviews, then you will continue to have: cliffies. :) the clock is ticking! YES! this is flat out bribery! _


	5. for the takin but I still have my doubts

_Hmm...re-edit of this chapter.

* * *

_

"I'm sorry Ashiwara-san." Akira smiled sheepishly, helping the other Go Pro to clean the stones. "But my mother expects me home for dinner."

Luckily, the refusal slid off of his Ashiwara's back easily. "Oh, no worries. I'm sure your mother would be very upset if you missed it."

Akira didn't miss the beat of humor. "Yes, very."

"Ah well," Ashiwara took the last few white stones, plopping them into the Go Ke with small clacks. "You better be going."

Akira nodded, waving one last time before the sliding door slid soundlessly and he walked out of his father's Go Salon.

As the sliding doors automatically opened for him, he couldn't help but lower his eyes. Hikaru had been both enraged and determined to outplay him when he had told him that he had already been chosen to represent Japan in the Hokuto Cup. Naturally, Hikaru's first reaction was shock and extreme injustice, which slowly turned into determination as he realized that he'd need to work harder to overcome Touya.

Usually, this never bothered Akira, in fact he rather liked Hikaru's determination to beat him. It was challenging, it was what having a rival is all about.

But with Sai's words echoing within him, all he felt was the cold and chilling sensation of fear. Fear that maybe one day Hikaru really _would _overcome him, and move on to become rivals with Sai, and leave him behind.

For now, he had the lead in their rivalry, and he wasn't planning on losing it.

The room had a quiet air to it, the only sounds were faint and from Touya Akiko busying herself around the kitchen, with the softened sounds of kitchen clatter, and the smooth melody of her humming. However, neither Sai nor Touya Koyo were paying any attention to that. The almost magnified sound of the Go stones from the room were enough to silence the noise, that and the ringing in their ears from a brilliant game. Not even his wife's yell as she realized she burned the chicken was enough to make the Meijin turn his head from the board and the now finished game.

The game had reached Yose.

But in the end, the Meijin had prevailed by half a moku. Which at this point, was not of any interest. Because with Komi, Sai would have won. They hadn't played with Komi though.

By the time the game had ended, it wasn't about winning or losing to the Meijin anymore, it was about finally, _finally_, having a rival. With eyes widened, he watched the boy in front of him, with his blue eyes stony and steely, unwavering from the board. This person in front of him—not a boy but a man—was destined to be his rival, he was sure of it. It had taken almost half a century, but he had finally found the person who was on par with his own skill. He blinked, as he realized that this was Shindou.

Shindou Hikaru, whom his dear son Akira was so very interested in, the boy who had shown so much potential, but not _quite _enough in the Yuugen no Ma.

But it was not.

From the way he played with Akira, and the way he played with everyone else, it was of decent playing skills, above average of course, and with time and more experience, he would be just as good as Title Holders, knocking some men off their high thrones in his wake. He had a potential that kept everyone's eyes on him, a potential that would one day finally bloom into something powerful and destined for greatness. But now, as a young boy, he was on his way, but not there yet.

Whoever faced the Goban from him now, was an experienced player who was in full blossom, the prime of his skill and at the highest point. And whoever this person may be, he was good enough for any sort of recognition—he was playing at his best, but still improving was the real remarkable part—and, if they were forced to play in a professional match, whoever sat on the other side of this Goban was enough to take any of his titles away from him.

Looking at the boy's eyes—flickering azure in the light of his study—he knew he couldn't resist asking.

"Who are you?" His eyes met the other's, both intense and steely and not backing down.

It was a staring match, the other studying with a depth that reached much more than just eyes and color, deeper into each others souls, and the Meijin could see a visible split in the boy before him.

Finally, Sai smirked, closing his eyes. "You don't know me."

"Ah." The elder Touya's voice gave nothing away. "You are not Shindou."

If anything, Sai's smirk widened. "No, I'm not."

"Then who are you?"

It was silent for a few moments, as Sai slid his eyes open, the eerie blue glowing in the wan spill of the study, big and bright and hauntingly blue like a clear summer day. He listened to the footsteps coming closer to the study at an alarming rate. There was still the daily clatter of the only female Touya still mulling about in the kitchen, but now there was another, of small footsteps making their way to the study. And Sai already knew who it was.

"You can call me Sai."

He got up then, the Meijin's eyes following him as he stood and walked to the door.

Suddenly, the sliding door to the study slammed open, revealing Touya Akira with a reddened face from briskly walking all the way here. His eyes widened, seeing the exact person he wanted to discuss with his father standing in the doorway. And even then, he wasn't surprised to see Akira in the slightest. If anything, he expected it. Without a word—as Akira sputtered to at least say _something_—Sai walked into the hallway and never looked back, both Touya's staring at his receding back.

"Father?" Akira called out worriedly.

But his father didn't seem to mind Sai's almost rude behavior (it was usually customary to at least study the game at the end) staring at the board in wonder again.

Akira followed his father's gaze to the board, and his eyes widened.

This game…was magnificent.

There were no mistakes. Every move from each side was perfect, perfectly countered and perfectly dodged. Each fight was precise, and at some points, Akira couldn't tell how the game was played. The attacks were silent and brutal, and it amazed him that these two amazing players seemed to be able to counter each other perfectly. He couldn't believe Shindou had played this game with his father…it was impossible. He remembered Shindou goofing off with Waya, missing games, rudely saying maybe he'd win a few titles or something. And then, he remembered the Shindou from recently. His glowing blue eyes, that wasn't actually Shindou, but _Sai_.

"Who played this?" He asked in wonder, breathless.

His father's eyes never left the board. "I'm not entirely sure."

He watched his father carefully, wondering if he should say anything more. Finally, he decided that if Sai was as good as this, then maybe he'd be good for his father. "This was Sai, wasn't it?"

Touya looked up sharply. "How did you know?"

Akira gulped. He hated it when he was on the receiving end of his father's glare. "He…told me."

"Told you?"

"Something about…how he could play two hands," Akira relayed quietly. "But he couldn't know when he would, or when he would play normally. And this strength isn't exactly Shindou, its Sai."

Luckily his father did not seem upset, but intrigued.

((before you ask which way to go))

Hikaru swatted at his shoulder once.

It didn't seem to be burned, but he rummaged around Akari's massive tote bag for another slather of suntan lotion. Him and Mitani—and every other guy Akari was friends with—liked to call it the monster bag, it was so enormous that she fit everything in their and pulled random things out like it was a magicians bag.

After pulling out perfume, lip gloss, bronzer, and _yes _he was pretty sure that was underwear, he found the suntan lotion.

"How's the Go club?" He made conversation idly.

Akari finally turned down Gackt's "Vanilla" to a nicer volume to everyone's ears. "It's going great. Kaneko-chan has got a lot of people playing already. And even though TsuiTsui graduated already, Mitani-kun has some guys who play for us!"

"Sounds cool." Hikaru grinned.

Akari sipped her lemonade. "You should come Hikaru! We could use a _Pro _teaching us. And bring some friends! Like Waya-kun."

Hikaru blinked. Akari blinked back. He took a subtle look at Mitani who had his eyes closed and was wired in sync with his iPod.

"Do you like Waya?" Hikaru whispered fiercely. He tried to remember a time when he had seen the two of them together.

Akari—boy user of the _century_—only fluffed her auburn hair, crossed her legs, and fluttered her eyes. "Maybe?"

Oh. _Oh_. Bad news for Waya. It wasn't like Akari wasn't pretty—because by god, ever since she stopped wearing boy shorts and polo shirt every other day and started wearing the normal fashion for teenage girls who like expensive things everyone took notice of her—and it wasn't like she hadn't had boyfriends before. Hikaru called them boy _toys _because he had lost count of them. The number exceeded more than his hands and toes, which at this point might not be a good thing either.

"…When did you even meet him?!" Hikaru sighed exasperatedly.

Akari shrugged. "Back when I still didn't understand Go at all, I went to see one of your games remember? He helped me out."

Ah. That's right. She was there. He was playing against an 8-Dan, and glowing in the fact that he was finally playing higher Dan players like Touya was.

But then, stealing another glance at a sleeping Mitani, Hikaru turned back to Akari. "What about Mitani?"

"What about Mitani-kun?" Akari echoed. "Nothing."

"Eh?" When were girls so freakishly confusing? "What about him?! I thought you liked him!"

"I do."

"Then what about Waya?!"

"Look Hikaru," Akari snapped irritably, lying back on her chair, long tanned legs crossed. "This is a girl thing. It gets annoying when you only like one person, who you don't even know will make a move. So you keep your options open, and like a few other guys. If one makes a move, you go with that guy. See?"

"No." Hikaru glowered. He didn't know that it was so complicated.

Akari sighed. "Ugh. Boys."

Hikaru yawned, pulling a button-up pinstripe shirt over his plane white one. He rolled up the sleeves to his elbows, and left the buttons open. One of those style tips he had learned from Akari, and never bothered to stop using it. Even when he was flopping around with people like Ogata—god did the man _never _wear anything besides a suit?!—and Akira, who wouldn't know the meaning of style if it looked them in the face, he kept his style. He decided taking up Go wasn't worth looking like a moron from the seventies.

His mother was calling back to him—yelling things about how he should eat more and be careful—but he waved her off and leapt out the door.

The station wasn't crowded at all today. Obviously there were people from the semi long line there was to get tickets, but usually the subway had so many people it was impossible to breathe or think. Now though, it was peaceful and mundane and Hikaru hoped it stayed like that until he got back. He wasn't going to pull an Akari and drive around without a full permit. He passed through the rotating bars after he pressed his ticket in, and rushed to the station when he heard the screeching of a train stopping.

The train inside was vaguely quiet.

Usually people didn't talk anyways, the roar from the tunnels enough to keep the entire train quiet. Hikaru had found a seat, his stop barely had anyone, but the second had dumped in a lot of people.

Finally, the stop for the Go institute.

He got off swiftly, plucking his iPod headphones out of his ears and stuffing the music player into his pocket. The tunnel was filled with the echoes of the people in it, murmurs and whispers of the two girls next to him, eyeing him and giggling in a very girly-esque way. The two business men in the corner dressed sharp and conversing quietly, and the others that leaned against the tiled walls and chattered quietly.

Sai was one of them, he was excited for Hikaru, who was going to play his match against a boy from the Kansai institute, and for Waya finally playing Ochi.

"Hikaru! Hikaru! I can't wait to see you play!" Sai ran about in his head. "I'm so-so excited—

"Shouldn't _I_ be excited?" He sarcastically replied.

"Maybe." Sai shrugged. "But I enjoy seeing your progress."

"Huh." He answered noncommittally.

He turned another corner, and saw the faint strands of red hair peaking from a vast sea of other people like a current. Waya, he noticed easily from the clothing _and_ the awkwardly red hair that he sported, in a place like Japan where everyone had uni-colored hair. He chuckled. Yes, Waya was standing out, grumbling over what seemed to be a malfunctioning cell phone? Waya was always the kind of person who was into all the new technology.

"Waya." He greeted with a smile.

The kitten-like boy looked up. "Oh, Shindou!"

Waya trotted over to him, stuffing his hands out of his pockets. Hikaru always enjoyed the fact that Waya also dressed like any other boy their age, honestly if every teenage go player dressed like Touya there would seriously be a problem. Both of them had enough decency to wear dress shirts—so most of the men who played go were stingy, and as a result the did _sometimes _need to bend the rules of fashion to fit in—it _was _the day they would play off to decide who would be playing in the Hokuto cup with Touya.

"Took you long enough." Waya snorted. "We're going to be late for the games!"

"Hey, its not my fault that I can't use a map." Hikaru grumbled.

They briskly walked out of the clearing they had made, as people in suits walked around them creating a small circle. Finally deciding to move, the two meshed into the rest of the crowd, Waya muttering how he kept pressing the contact button instead of the settings button, and Hikaru grinning at him. For some reason, he wasn't worried about his match at all. Sure, it bothered him Akira had been seeded for the tournament, but he'd show him it didn't matter.

He second glanced at Waya, who seemed more upset than just repeatedly pressing the wrong button on his phone. The other boy looked tense, he noted and Sai agreed, as they turned another corner and the sun shone in their faces. Maybe…Waya was upset because he was playing Ochi?

"Waya," Hikaru began in nicest tone he could. He knew how defensive Waya got with these kinds of things. "Who are you playing today?"

Twitch. There we go. That was it.

"Ochi."

"Oh." Hikaru tried to sound surprised, even though he _had _checked the roster. "Nervous?"

"And pissed." He added dully. "I don't want to lose to that guy! He's such a little brat, who always thinks he's better than everyone, it pisses me off so bad."

Hikaru wasn't sure that Waya looked to Ochi as a rival or anything—more like a hotheaded punk that he was constantly pissed at—but he knew it maddened him to no end that Ochi could still beat him. In the same way that Ochi was constantly upset that Akira only looked to him-Sai really-as a rival. At this point, Sai protested quickly, saying Hikaru really was his rival…it had just taken Sai to give him the push into the Go world.

"He is a little brat." Hikaru nodded in agreement.

Waya kicked a pebble on the curb. "Gah. Whatever. Who are you up against?"

"Some guy from the Kansai Institute." Hikaru shrugged. "He's supposed to be pretty decent and unconventional."

"What a match up, huh?" Waya grinned.

"I know."

((remember where you've been))

Akira wasn't dumb.

The first thing he noticed after he studied the game—his father wasn't going to be removing it from the Goban for a while—was that his Father had a very satisfied smile on his face. And from the way Hikaru played, it was obvious that it was Sai whom his father played against. Akira frowned, he desperately wanted to play such a great game as well with Sai. However, he figured it was him who needed to do the growing, not the other way around.

Yet still, Hikaru must have played many games with Sai. To the point that, if he continued, he would only get better.

It motivated him to do better as well.

At his father's study group the next day, he watched the rest of the former Meijin's students file in, the Goban still set up from the same game he played yesterday, a spare one set next to it for studying and replaying. He figured his father had made a kifu of the game as well. But as the startled members of the study group asked whom the Meijin had played with, he simply replied that he had once again met Sai on the internet and had played a game with him.

Akira didn't bother to deny the statement. He was sure that Hikaru would rather have his privacy.

"Sai?" Ogata's eyes widened. "The legendary internet player?!"

"Sensei!" Ashiwara swooned. "This is an _amazing _game."

Akira couldn't help but agree.

"Sai agreed to play another game with me." The former Meijin said with his eyes closed. "I did want a rematch, and I was not disappointed."

Ogata caught on sharply. "Who…set the match up with you?"

"An acquaintance of mine." His father answered vaguely.

The study was filled with people from the Meijin's study group, and Ogata's mouth slowly closed shut, the intense fire of curiosity still burning within his eyes, but it had left a smoldering flame as more people came into the room. Ogata may be on a never ending quest to find answers about the internet player shrouded in mystery, but he wasn't stupid. The Meijin was a man who deserved respect, and would not be pleased if Ogata began to ask more questions about Sai with more potential eavesdroppers.

"But—

"Enough questions. Let's discuss the game."

Top of Form


	6. Stay Awake! get a grip and get out your

Hikaru watched the board in both extreme amazement and under disbelief. This Yashiro character was like him in so many ways and yet unlike him, that it made his head spin in a way that he just knew this time tomorrow he'd be keeling over a toilet. Yashiro may not have started the game with a Tengen hand, but 5-5 was just as absolutely unexpected. The game reeled on in a spiral of originality from there.

And then Hikaru had the decency to play the Tengen for the second hand, more to surprise Sai then to surprise Yashiro.

"Honestly, Hikaru." He sighed. "Second hand Tengen? What are you thinking?"

Hikaru smirked at his other half. "Heh, wouldn't _you _like to know?"

Sai only grumbled, returning to watch the interesting game.

When Yashiro played 5-5 again, Hikaru knew that every great Go Master from now way back into the Edo period would be rolling in their graves. At the moment, Sai was rolling in his head, bemoaning the fact that this game defied Go physics, if there was such a thing.

Meanwhile, as Sai enjoyed himself watching through Hikaru's eyes, Waya and Ochi had gone into their usual collaboration of extreme hatred for each other, Ochi with his stick-up-his-ass attitude and Waya with his I-hate-you attitude made for a fiery game with an outcome looming over the distance.

In the end, Hikaru prevailed over Yashiro in a mind boggling game that made the other players recreating it in another room knock their heads trying to figure out where each stone went and how the game had gotten to such a point. Of course, Akira had figured that this was most definitely Hikaru playing, whatever influence Sai had on him didn't even leave a trace. Hikaru had most definitely played this game, only he would play so unconventionally.

Waya was disappointed with his loss, and even more infuriated by Ochi and his cocky attitude, but had soon lost the emotional turmoil when he saw Hikaru's game with Yashiro.

-

"Yashiro?" She picked at her strawberry shortcake. "Never heard of him."

Somewhere across a cast sea of tea plates and cookies, Akari frowned

Hikaru sighed. "Of course you wouldn't Akari. He's from the Kansai institute, and he's really…different.

It was Thursday again too soon.

After his extremely eventful match with Yashiro—which ended in his head reeling with newfound moves and plays—he had returned to look at his calendar and realize it was Thursday. Which meant that Akari was going to come over and drag him and Mitani somewhere. And, like speaking of the devil, she called almost immediately after he thought that, and came to pick him up. The only warning he got was a cheer from his mother, who once again had the idea of grandchildren stuck in her brain since the moment he obtained his god-like tan.

Luckily, Akari got grounded for taking the family car and nearly getting into a fender-bender with it, and then she also got grounded from driving because she wasn't supposed to driving anyways. So, Akari's older sister drove them this time, to—of all ungodly and random places Akari could have picked—a tea house. Not even a _Japanese _tea house but an English one. With tea cakes. And crumpets. Honestly.

Hikaru tried to remember the days that Akari used to catch bugs and smear firefly guts on her cheeks like war paint as they played man hunt around the neighborhood. But the only image he could get was Akari with her lips pursed, hands on her hips, newly manicured nails twitching slightly and her yelling at him 'to get his ass down before she came up there and did it for him'. Suffice to say moments like these when she really _did _do that really sucked.

However, Hikaru got to gloat that Mitani and Kaga were also dragged to the event.

"Remind me again why the fuck I'm here." Kaga groaned, unceremoniously wedging a finger into his ear.

"Kaga!" Akari pinched his ear. "Language!"

He rolled his eyes.

Mitani, quietly sipping his Earl Grey tea, looked up. "Akari…why are we here again?"

"We needed a reunion." Akari promptly explained. "When was the last time we all saw each other."

Frowning, there was no rebuke. Akari grinned triumphantly.

Hikaru took the time to notice the buttered cupcakes and the golden rimmed teacups for a matter of sixteen seconds before he decided that he just could not stomach this.

"But why a _tea party_?!" He said at last, sending her a scathing look as he did so.

Akari—in the most Akari way possible—shrugged daintily, and over the curve of her shoulder he could see various old people. "Because I felt like it."

"Because you felt like it." Kaga echoed forlornly. "Do all women think like retards?"

She pinched his ear again and he yelped. "Like you don't enjoy this—

"My manly pride it withering away." Hikaru pointed out. "And I bet so is Mitani's."

Mitani had the decency to blush a little and look away, mainly because it was the truth and he just didn't want Akari to get mad at him and kept his mouth shut. Better to stay quiet and suffer then to face the wrath of Akari. And plus, he was so madly in love with the girl if she dragged him into a make up store he wouldn't say a word.

"Yuuki-kun!" Akari looked scandalized.

He shrugged indifferently.

"Well anyways," She started again. "It's not like there aren't cute girls here. I bet they think you all are charming for being so nice to me."

"I bet they think we're crazy to go in here." Hikaru said laconically.

Kaga had to agree.

"Well," Akari drawled flippantly. "I wouldn't be so sure of that." Her chocolate eyes moved to a table over, where a blonde and her friends looked over fleetingly, before looking back and giggling to each other.

"Oh god." Said Hikaru, whose mind went something like: Go Go Go Go Go Ramen Go. The word 'girl' not even a passing thought.

Kaga however, made a low whistle. Mitani simply hid himself behind his tea cup.

"Honestly Hikaru, they're cute!"

"They're weird." Like he did almost every time he met Akari, Hikaru tried to melt into his seat. "Why else would they be hanging around a tea house if they weren't?!"

"Huh." Akari blinked. Before a smile formed. "Well, one's coming over."

"What?!" Hikaru yelped. Kaga draped and arm over his seat and winked at them flirtatiously. Mitani inched closer to Hikaru.

"Hey." The blond with pretty light brown eyes smiled at him. She tossed her hair back and batted her lashes. Smiling with her sweet gummy mouth and canting her him to one side.

"Uh…" Somewhere, a part of him died a little. "Hi."

"What's your name?"

He tried not to squeak, feeling like a cornered little mouse with this monstrous, grotesque (in spirit, not in body, he hated to admit) cat looming over him with large shiny teeth and equally shiny horrific eyes. The girl had a nice smile, her jean cut off skirt riding up, flashing the smooth curve of her thighs, a jingling charm bracelet on her ankle.

Hikaru, in retrospect, would come to realize at this point that Sai was good for more than just playing go.

His eyes faded from the sparkling verdant into a deep blue like an autumn day.

"My name's Sai." He smiled charmingly, his voice smooth and suave.

Akari, who was currently talking to Mitani in hushed voices, turned to blink at Hikaru, startled.

"Oh." The girl blushed profusely. "I'm Natsumi. It's great to meet you."

"Likewise."

Hikaru sighed as he leaned into the calming sensation of giving his other half reign. It was so relaxing.

The girl—Natsumi or whatever—giggled slightly, holding her hand adorned with jangling bracelets and a ring or two for him to shake. Her blush only increased as Sai took her hand gently and looked into her eyes.

"O-Oh, well I have to get back now." She fidgeted slightly. "Bye!"

Sai, noticing that the girl was walking away and his job was finished, blinked and let the sensation of being pulled back into Hikaru's subconscious take over him. Hikaru blinked into the light, pupils dilating as he did so. Akari was gaping at him, so was Kaga, Mitani didn't seem to care much.

"Sai?" She frowned at him. "That's mean of you to trick her."

Hikaru shrugged nonchalantly. "Well, I didn't really like her anyways."

"But that's still mean." She daintily sipped her coffee.

Hikaru didn't answer, only grinning widely and starting the conversation over to something else.

((before you ask which way to go))

The mouse swerved a little, in little swaying patterns that could only mean the user was bored out of his or her complete mind. Finally, the moment he was waiting for. A small little compute jingle sounded as the 'resign' button popped on the screen.

Another one.

That made Sai's winning streak just one more. And this one was pretty prominent, judging from his skill he or she had to be at least a 5-dan. The watch list on the corner doubled as more people began to file in to watch. If Hikaru hadn't changed his privacy settings, he would have been mobbed by the sheer amount of people who sent game requests.

He was happy that Ichikawa was letting him use the computer in the backroom, so he didn't have to go to an internet café to use the internet. It was great that it was so much easier here, where no one would bother him. The door was open a little and he could see said woman flittering about a bit like a hummingbird, serving tea and chatting a little with the costumers and she did so.

Hikaru clicked on one of the names that had game requested one—he'd seen the name before, and that was why he was curious as to who it was—and began the game. The computer did the Nigiri for them, and he got black.

In his mind, Sai's grin was feral.

The boy crushed with black.

It turns out, that Sai was really getting the adrenaline rush that he hadn't got in a while.

This guy was good.

The two were so engrossed in their game they didn't hear the smooth motion of the Go Salon's electronic Shoji screen door sliding open. They didn't hear Ichikawa's greeting either.

Touya Akari picked up a cup of tea on his way to one of the tables, deciding that he'd replay a few games or so and see whenever Hikaru decided to show up. The green haired prodigy hadn't caught up with the times of cell phones as much as his same-aged peers had, and didn't think to text Hikaru to come over. But he was content with replaying some of his newer games…one still lingering. The one between Hikaru—Sai, if he was going for technicalities—and his father. A magnificent came, in everyone's standards.

He remembered his own game with Sai, and the other boy's words.

Were him and Sai fighting…for the position as Hikaru's rival? In all honesty, Akira didn't even understand why he was in the running in the first place. If Sai wanted to be Hikaru's rival, Akira didn't understand why Hikaru would pass up that chance. To see someone like Sai play daily—to play and be mentored by someone of that stature…where did he line up side by side with that?

"Akira-kun?" Ichikawa called out worriedly.

Akira looked up sharply from his reflection in the tea, the image distorting as the liquid moved. "Ah! I'm fine…just thinking."

"Are you waiting for Hikaru?" She asked good-naturedly, a bit like a mother hen.

He nodded sheepishly. "I didn't ask him to come today or anything, I just thought I'd study here."

"Oh, well he is here if you want to play with him." She said nonchalantly, one hand on her hip and the other holding the teapot.

He looked up sharply, eyes swiftly sweeping the room for the blond bangs that he knew would be Hikaru's. But he didn't see any. Questioningly, he looked back to Ichikawa. "Where…?"

She pointed over to the half closed door that lead to the backroom with the computer. "He's playing Netgo." She shrugged. "I don't understand why though. The people here are just as good…"

Akira blinked at that.

Netgo? Why would Hikaru—

His eyes widened in realization.

Of course. Because Hikaru wasn't playing as Hikaru, he was playing as Sai.

"Ah, thank you Ichikawa-san." He got up from his seat quickly.

She giggled slightly. "Oh, no problem Akira-kun!"

He walked over to the half open door, noticing that Hikaru was completely engrossed in his game, and that it was actually Hikaru, from the way the light his eyes green. He closed the door slightly, until only a sliver showed the world outside the small cluttered back room. It was mainly used by Ichikawa and whatever staff the Salon may have, to keep papers and such. A list of receipts, and the ordering forms for the various things needed monthly. Like the provided tea and coffee, tables and chairs…etc.

The room was a small rectangular shape, with a counter that split through the middle, where the computer faced the wall opposite to the door. At the angle, Hikaru could easily see Akira in the doorway, but the boy seemed to interested in his game to notice.

He walked over quietly.

"…Shindou?"

The boy jumped. Luckily, as he accidently clicked the mouse it landed somewhere else beside the electronic Go board.

"Touya!" He breathed. "When did you get here?!"

"I've been here." Akira sighed. "You just haven't noticed."

"Oh." He said dumbly, playing another move, hands still shaky from the scare. "Well its not my fault, this guy I'm playing is really, really good! He's like…impressive compared to the other small fry I've been playing."

"You playing?" Akira echoed. "Or Sai?"

Hikaru smiled sheepishly. "Well Sai technically, but it gets annoying talking in third person all the time."

Akira nodded, not knowing what to say to that exactly. It was an odd and peculiar subject, talking about Sai with Hikaru, or talking about Hikaru with Sai. Either way, he still couldn't quite toggle his mind around the fact that they were one and the same, and still different. It was just a little to much for his perfectly sane brain to be derailed into a bit of a psyche ward. Not that Sai being there was a bad thing…for the go world, it was probably the best thing that had happened since Shuusaku himself. However, the issue of getting everyone to know that Hikaru was both Sai, and not Sai, was a much more difficult task.

"Who are you playing?" Akira decided for a change of subject.

"Huh." Hikaru looked up from the blinding black and white stones to the little text box a bit above it to try and find the name.

He squinted, not used to reading English.

"Uh…Seiji, I think." He read aloud.

"Seiji…" Akira echoed, somehow that name sounded familiar. But he couldn't bring himself to remember exactly who was named—

"Shindou!" Akira whispered hoarsely, eyes darting to the sliver of the room outside that could be seen. "That's Ogata-sensei!"

"Serious?" Hikaru blinked, grinning. "Oh dude, that's _awesome_. Sai's been dying to play him."

Akira shushed him quickly. "Don't talk too loud! He's upstairs with my father!"

Hikaru blinked. "He's _here_?"

"Yeah." Akira nodded quickly. "Him and my father went up this morning when we first came in here."

Hikaru digested the information. That was just down right weird. First off, he had finally gotten someone that was actually decent compared to the mediocre players that surfed the net, but not only that, it was Ogata! That was an accomplishment. He honestly hadn't thought that Ogata…_Ogata_ would play Net go, let alone almost always be on his watchers list! Still, it was cool in a way, that the man was not even a flight of stairs above him and that they were (well, Sai and him) finally got a chance to play.

"Huh." Hikaru blinked at the irony, before hearing a familiar jingle from the speakers. "He resigned."

"He did?!" Akira leaned in closer to get a better look at the game.

"Akira?" He heard Ichikawa's pleasant voice ringing across the mumbles of other Go players. "Oh he's—

"Where?— " His father was saying.

Akira looked up sharply, as did Hikaru.

Ogata had come down the stairs with his father. Ichikawa was talking to them pleasantly in the main room, probably still holding the tea and probably still chattering away with some of the regulars. They probably came down to find Akira and show him the game he had just seen from Hikaru's screen. Akira gave a quick look to Hikaru before bolting out of the room, grabbing papers as he did so to at least pretend that he had come in there for a reason. The three in the main room looked up as he neared them.

"Oh, there's Akira-kun!"

"Father, Ogata." He nodded pleasantly. They greeted him back.

"Ogata just finished a game with 'Sai'!" Ichikawa told him matter-of-factly.

"Oh?" He tried to act surprised.

Ogata growled. "He won by three moku."

"Ah, Akira, what were you in the storage room for?" His father asked lightly, eying the papers in Akira' hand.

"Oh—uh…" The boy started, flustered. He eyed the papers he had picked up. A receipt for a broken Goban…?

"What are you doing with that?" Ichikawa looked scandalized. Apparently, he was not supposed to see that.

"Uhm—I—Uh…" Akira struggled for words. "I needed some paper." He finished lamely.

They all shot him odd looks, as if to say there was Kifu at the front desk and that was information he should _know _by now, and Akira was thinking that—from the way Ogata rolled his eyes (probably in a testy mood from his loss)—Ogata was going to speak up about that when Ichikawa clasped her hands together. She opened her mouth, sending a confused glance to Akira, who stiffened even more as a sudden sense of dread crashed down as she opened her mouth.

"I thought you went in there to see Shindou?" She asked innocently.

Ichikawa _no_!!

He gaped, ready to come up with the quickest and lamest excuse he could think of when Ogata beat him to the punch.

"Shindou?" The man asked secretively. "What's Shindou doing in the backroom?"

He sent a fleeting look to Ichikawa, as if to warn her not to tell Ogata for the sake of all things in Hikaru's sanity, but the woman did not see the look.

"Oh…he's using the computer—

She didn't get to finish her sentence as Ogata stormed over.

Top of Form


	7. safe from the weight of the world just

_What's up with this word doc on ffnet?! Seriously, it made my entire doc underlined, then in italics, then in bold! And erased all my lines! Grr... anyways, this is more of the manga plot then of my plot, because I need to get this moving! _

Hikaru was not the smartest person out there, in fact, there were times when Sai believed Hikaru wasn't entirely smart at all (luckily, Go didn't have much to do with arithmetic or Japanese history) at least, not with street smarts…or academic smarts…well, the point was Sai believed he was created sometimes as a second persona to help Hikaru out in those cases.

Like now, for instance.

Obviously in a matter of seconds Ogata was going to catch them, and also obviously that wasn't a good scenario. Luckily for Hikaru, Sai acted quickly and exited out of the screen, and typing in the website address for some other thing (of what, exactly, he wasn't paying attention).

The door slammed open, and a couple loose papers fluttered into the air.

Ogata paid them no heed, as he yanked the roller chair away from the computer, Hikaru letting an indignant yelp as Ogata did so, and his chair rolled in dizzying circles into the wall.

"W-What--

Ogata found himself face to face with the epic climax to this week's Naruto manga, and something he wasn't entirely interesting in seeing.

"Y-You--!" He snarled furiously, knowing that whatever evidence could have been on the computer had been erased.

Sai watched the older man through hooded blue eyes, and watched the man suddenly tense under the gaze.

Sometimes--actually, many times--he wondered what his purpose was. Why Hikaru had created him. Hikaru had never seen any sort of psychiatrist, or any mental institutions for having a split so Sai had no way of knowing what his purpose as being Hikaru's alternate ego was. He figured that he was created to fill the character flaws that Hikaru subconsciously believed existed within him. Why a near eleven year old boy who had never heard of Go besides a passing term that old men used would make his alternate ego a go godwas beyond him, nor the reason why said soccer nut would then begin to play the game.

Sai didn't understand why sometimes Hikaru even let him play, as if he was an actual person who had needs and wants, when he was obviously just another part of Hikaru--the fake part--and sometimes that made him even more confused. He'd never show Hikaru his confusion, because the boy looked up to him as if he was flawless, when in reality, he was just as flawed as Hikaru was.

Even when Sai was created, Hikaru was always a social boy, but for some reason he had a problem with formalities and following societies rules (especially when greeting or addressing his elders), which Sai figured was the reason he was so good at that.

Another thing Hikaru must have felt ashamed of, the fact that no one was intimidated him.

Another thing Sai was unintentionally brilliant at.

Even now, when Sai pierced the man in front of him with his near glowing blue eyes, the man stiffened as if he was dealing with a higher being with such prowess that he felt intimidated.

"It's just manga." Sai shrugged nonchalantly, but his eyes said different. His eyes challenged the other man to say something--to fraud the words--yet Ogata did nothing, only clenching his fists and looking like he wanted to say something.

Ogata sputtered a little more, before sending him the worst and most scathing 'I'm going to get you' look he had ever seen, and then he stormed out of the room just as quickly as he had come in, leaving Hikaru pressed against the wall in his roller chair with a sense of relief as he breathed in. Sai slowly faded back into his mind, and he felt his eyes adjust to the light.

Hikaru sighed. The entire ordeal must have taken at least a decade off his life span.

This time when the door to the back room opened, it was much quieter and softer, signaling that Akira was letting himself back into the room.

"Ogata looked…cowed." Akira couldn't seem to think of any other word.

Hikaru shrugged. "Sai does that to people."

"I can tell." He chuckled, but it sounded a bit forced. Akira looked as if he was thinking about something to say. "That was close."

"More close than I wanted it to be." Hikaru nodded, exiting the screen out and standing up. "I don't want anyone finding out about Sai."

Akira stood for a moment, suddenly having this 'third-wheel' feeling. Which should never happen, because there were only _two _people in the room. "…But I know."

"Yeah."

That 'third-wheel' feeling suddenly turned into an unwanted feeling, and Akira felt a bit angered by the fact that after all this running and chasing and feeling crazy for it that his knowledge of who he'd been chasing this whole time was unintentional. That if he hadn't been smart enough to deduce who Hikaru and Sai were (and where the line between them started and ended) Hikaru would never have told him.

"But it doesn't matter." Hikaru added. "I'd rather have you know than not knowing."

Akira blinked. "Really?"

"It…straightens things out." _Who's rivals, and who isn't. _He tried to explain while leaving out that last part, but in the end it made Akira more confused than he was before. Hikaru reached for the door handle, and quickly peered his head outside.

The Meijin and Ogata had left, whether they were upstairs or simply left the building he didn't really care.

Hikaru quickly strode over to the exit, making sure that Ichikawa was too busy serving customers to notice him walking through the parlor. The last thing he wanted was for her to accidentally rat him out again (he couldn't really get mad at her, because he had never told her not to tell them where he was) and then he'd have Ogata all on his case again. Honestly, that guy needed a life, or a girlfriend. Maybe he'd stop jumping at any chance to accuse him of being Sai (or at least knowing Sai).

"Shindou!" Akira called after him.

He turned around as he held the door open.

"What…" He stopped a little ways away from him, looking confused and startled. "Do you mean by that?"

Hikaru blinked at him. "…" He opened his mouth to tell him that by telling him about Sai it declared who was chasing who, but in the end, he didn't say it. "Nothing."

He turned away, and heard the sliding doors close shut.

-

Sai mumbled about in his head, and Hikaru looked up from the Kifu he had been studying.

Even as his split, there were times that Hikaru had absolutely no idea what Sai was thinking about. They couldn't hear each other's thoughts unless they wanted, so most of the time Hikaru simply spoke aloud to clear up all the confusion.

Hikaru opened his mouth to ask Sai what he was thinking about (it was odd, really, Sai had been doing a lot of thinking lately, and had been unnaturally quiet) but he stopped himself in mid breath for air. He didn't know exactly what Sai was thinking--or, who he was thinking about--but he knew it had to do with that day that he had let Sai take over. He didn't know what happened, but Sai had vaguely mentioned he challenged Akira to a game, but didn't venture to tell him anything further than that. Hikaru was left to ponder what had happened that day, and what could have settled so deeply into both of their minds that Akira had asked him to speak with Sai. Luckily, Akari had saved him that one time, but it wasn't the last…

_Hikaru was too exhausted to deal with what he knew would be an onslaught of questions, and then he would say vague answers, and then Akira would leave just as confused as he was when he came, and then the process would repeat itself. Akira was just like Ogata in some ways, always asking and questioning and sometimes it was too much to deal with._

_And Hikaru didn't need it, because at the moment he was facing Morishita and for some reason…it was so much difficult than he thought it would be. _

_Luckily for him, Akira too was facing one of his mentors, this one being Ogata. _

_So when Akira plopped into one of the long stretch couches in the lounge next to him, he didn't ask any questions. Hikaru looked at the Coke can in his hands--he hadn't even drank it really, his nerves were too fried--the vending machine next to the couches still had his change in there, and he hadn't felt like getting up to get it. _

"_So, Ogata huh?" He tried conversationally. _

_Akira only nodded mutely, looking too lost in thought to say anything else. _

_Hikaru nursed his coke, not really bothering with conversation. He figured him and Akira had reached the point where there weren't any awkward silences between them (this didn't include when they discussed Sai, because then everything was awkward) and that there wasn't a point of talking when neither wanted to talk. _

"_He isn't concentrating." Akira said finally, he said it so tonelessly that Hikaru found it hard to decipher what he was thinking. Not that he was good at figuring people out, that was what Sai did. "I think he's still thinking about Sai."_

_Hikaru didn't say anything. He wasn't sure if that was Akira's way of trying to steer the conversation to Sai, or he was simply saying that because it was a fact. If Hikaru could groan right now, he would. All these undertones when dealing with people, sometimes he wondered why he ever bothered. _

"_Morishita, huh?" Akira shot back, once he noticed Hikaru wasn't falling for the bait. _

"_It's…difficult." Hikaru grumbled. "It seems that Sensei is in trouble…but I feel I won't keep the lead for long."_

"_Ah." Akira smiled wryly. "Know the feeling."_

_Hikaru stood then, noticing the time and deciding to get there a little early to look at the board some more. He didn't bother saying good bye, knowing fully well that Akira was probably following him. _

"_Shindou." _

_He turned around._

"_Can I talk to him?" He asked slowly. _

"_Uh…" Hikaru was cowed. He didn't think Akira would come out and say it. _

"_I need to ask him…about something he said." _

_His eyes…the eerie glowing blue eyes as he asked him why Hikaru thought of him as a rival. His ending words--how he'd once again become Hikaru's rival--and his reasons for talking to him. Sai confused him much, much more than Hikaru did, mainly because he was such an enigma. And so Akira needed to talk to him. _

_Hikaru shrugged. "After, maybe."_

_As he watched Hikaru's back, Akira noted with some amusement that that was probably the most straight forward answer he had received from Hikaru in a long time. _

((before you ask which way to go))

"_Did you know Touya was thinking of moving out?" _

Hikaru shrugged, adjusting the food his mother had packed him so that he could get a better signal. It was sheer luck that he still had it on the subway. "Uh, no, but I wasn't particularly interested in knowing that either. Why do _you _know that Waya?"

"_Err--well I--" _Waya sounded a bit indignant. _"I wanted a match against him, so I went to the Meijin's salon."_

"You did?" Hikaru sounded extremely surprised. "How was the game?"

"_He wasn't there. But I asked that one lady and she said that he was probably home, and then she started babbling on about him--honestly Hikaru, that kid has a freaking fan club!--and how he was thinking of moving. So it's true?"_

"I don't know." Hikaru hummed. "We don't really talk about personal stuff like that."

"_Oh, well I can't get over the fact he wants to move out! Seriously, why give up a life where all these great players come in and have study groups, and then all he has to do is walk down the stairs to play the freaking Meijin! Honestly."_

Hikaru shrugged. "I'm sure he has his reasons."

"_Yeah well, I think he' s just being spoiled--_

When the angry flow of Waya's voice suddenly stopped, Hikaru knew he had lost the signal, and he sighed. There was no point in calling back until he re-surfaced.

He reflected on what Waya was ranting about.

Hikaru hadn't bothered to ask because he knew that there rivalry was just simply that, rivalry. He wasn't even sure they were friends at this point. If they ever talked about anything besides Go it was about Sai, and neither of those two conversations really qualified for friendship. But still, he felt as if he had some sort of connection with the other boy, which was the reason he knew what the other was feeling.

Hikaru understood that the reason Akira would leave such a life behind was for freedom.

He felt the same way a lot, actually.

Living in that house would forever be living in the Meijin's shadow. Those great players that Waya was rattling on about came to challenge the Meijin, not the younger Touya. And being there and knowing that if his father wasn't the Meijin he wouldn't be able to get those opportunities probably made Akira feel like he needed to try harder, so that one day those players would visit his house to play _him_. Not his father.

Hikaru felt the same with Sai. Everyone clamored to face his alternate ego--even the Meijin had begged for another game--but none really wanted to play him. Of course they saw potential in him, but was potential really the same as full talent?

Hikaru shook his head. It was stupid to feel jealous of someone who was technically himself.

The train slowed to a stop as they reached the station, and Hikaru hopped out of the train along with a dozen other people.

He looked around for Yashiro, and his tell-tale hair.

"Shindou!"

He turned to see the other boy stalking over to him, just as weighed down from stuff as he was. "It's been a month since we last met." Yashiro was hard-eyed and stone-face as he said this, as if this fact truly bugged him. He said it with such determination that Hikaru didn't really know how to respond. So he smiled.

"Yeah." Hikaru grinned. "We can finally have a rematch." Yashiro made a motion to say something else, but was stopped.

The PA came on with a jingle. "Train Number Two has now arrived."

"Oh!" Hikaru blinked. "We have to get going!"

He motioned for the other boy to follow him, making sure he was as he slithered his way around the crowd, and into the train that was heading for Touya's house. As they boarded the train among a slew of other people, Yashiro must have felt the need to start up the conversation again.

"Is Touya's house far from here?"

"Not really, but its my first time going."

"So you play Go with Touya often…" Yashiro said thoughtfully, before he changed the subject. "Smells like food!"

They erupted into a conversation about parents and Go, and Hikaru learned that Yashiro's parents didn't want him playing Go. Hikaru felt a little humbled at that, knowing fully well that he was lucky his parents stood by his decision. Touya was even luckier, his parents were completely backing him in his decision to play professionally. Sai yawned in the back of his head. There wasn't much for his split to do besides (well, Hikaru wasn't entirely sure what exactly his split did when he wasn't needed, but he was sure that he slept or something like that)…well, nothing. And he didn't really care much for anything besides Go.

After a couple detours (mainly because Hikaru had no sense of direction whatsoever) they reached Touya's house.

As Touya opened the door Yashiro shouted "Finally!" in relief.

"Finally?" Touya echoed.

"This guy got us lost on the way from the train station!" Yashiro growled accusingly.

"You got lost?" Touya sighed exasperatedly. "Didn't I draw you a map?"

Hikaru made a move to defend himself when Akira cut him off again, this time, a little annoyed.

"See? Didn't I _tell _you it would be better if I met you at the station?!"

"I can find my way fine with a map!" Hikaru shot back defensively.

They small talked about Yashiro still going to high school, and then the two got into something of their first fight (honestly, what was up with Akira and getting into those?) in which Akira told him that he needed to do more than just 'get a few wins' and Yashiro got defensive. Not that the kid didn't need a wake up call, but Hikaru still thought Akira could have done it nicer. He was too thankful that their relationship had re drawn itself as rival/friends with their occasional shouting match over nothing in particular. Note: They already argued about maps. Yashiro didn't say anything in return, saying that there wasn't anything he could say back until his Go could speak for him. It vaguely made him think of what Ko Yongha had said about Shuusaku. However, he may be upset but he _knew _he'd say something back, even if he ended up letting Sai play the game.

Yashiro jumped into action as Touya set up the board for speed Go, and Hikaru shook himself out of his musings.

* * *


	8. take a second to set things straight

_How does my muse for this manga always torment me so? _

_So yes, I'm back. For a bit, anyway. I'm a BIG fan of yaoi (well written ones, with in character personalities) so if you see some here, don't be so surprised!_

_Theme--Stay Awake! (Dreams only last for the night)

* * *

_

Of all the days in of the week, Monday surely must be the worst.

Worst of all, the nerve wracking panic and overwhelming sense of anger that accompanied him every time he even thought of Ko Yongha. He bristled. That little bastard. Sai tried to placate him, but he quickly brushed off the soothing mental nudges. Regardless of his slight (slight, slight) obsession with Shuusaku to have a foreign asshole with no manners degrade such a wonderful go player like that...Hikaru bit his lip, and strode out of the car. It didn't matter anyway, Touya was first board, and so regardless, they wouldn't be playing.

There was some sort of nervous undertone that made its way until his he rubbed his palms of the crisp edges of his suit, wondering why he was getting so nervous suddenly.

"_It's just a hotel..." _Hikaru told himself quickly, shaking out his hair.

"_If its just a hotel," _Sai mused._"Then why are you so nervous?"_

"_I'm not sure, honestly."_

Touya and Yashiro weren't there yet, or maybe they were and had already checked in, either way he didn't see their equally strange colored hair when he felt the push of the air conditioning as he made his way inside. Instead, he saw a familiar face and another that he had never seen before—but could probably make an estimated guess at.

"Suyon!" He called, delighted, when he noticed the boys face brighten.

He said a couple more light words to the darkly attractive man, before the taller of the two walked away, and Suyon whirled on him.

"Shindou!" He grounded out. "I hope you haven't forgotten that you owe me a game."

Hikaru blinked. Sometimes, it was difficult to tell Suyon's emotions when he said everything with such a straight, near angered looking visage.

"Of course not!" He retorted hotly. And then, as an after thought. "Wait...Suyon, you speak Japanese?"

The young Korean Pro looked a bit miffed. "Yes, I studied Japanese to prepare for our next meeting."

Hikaru had the decency to only look slightly confused. "...?"

"This time," Suyon began with a look of determination. "I want to be able to say, "My name is Hon Suyon."

Hikaru grinned, waiting a few more moments for Suyon's face to morph into confusion before he joked, "What? ...Your Japanese is really bad!"

For a moment or two, as more people in business suits passed them, Suyon seemed to believe him. And then he realized that Hikaru was joking.

"Cut the crap already!" The shorter boy huffed. "Shindou, in the Hokuto Cup, I''m third board. And you?"

"Second." He answered immediately, seeing the shock on the Korean boy's face.

But if anything, Suyon seemed to be even more determined. "The day after the Hokuto Cup, come to my Uncle's Go Salon. I'll postpone my trip back to Korea so we can play and see who wins. Alright?"

Hikaru nodded. "Okay, I'll go."

Suyon turned, walking away as his reflection turned as well on the shiny marble floors of the elegant hotel—this place was surely the nicest he'd ever seen for a Go Tournament, Hikaru noted—when Hikaru stopped him. "Wait a sec! That man you were with...that was Ko Yongha, wasn't it? You guy's are close friends?"

Suyon paused, as if mulling how to put it into words, and then how to translate that into Japanese. "I admire him," He began, over his shoulder. "Why do you ask?"

Hikaru's fist tightened. "Do Korean players understand who Shuusaku is?" He asked abruptly.

"Of course!" Suyon binked. "In the past, everyone came to Japan to catch up."

The boy looked down, hair the color of lemon peels hiding his face. "But someone said Shuusaku was of no use."

Suyon frowned for a moment, as if trying to see where this sudden conversation had come from. Finally, he asked with some amount of confusion, "What's this got to do with Ko Yongha?"

"Ko Yongha was the one who said it!" There was fire in the two-toned boys hair as his dark emerald eyes met his, sparkling underneath the classy chandelier above them and collecting and refracting light like mirrors. There was something fierce behind them, and for a moment, as a beam of light hit them, they seemed blue.

Suyon reeled in shock. "...what?"

Hikaru brushed past him, looking readily annoyed. Or perhaps it was a deeper, more angered emotion. "No matter how strong he is," The blonde began contemptuously. "He doesn't stand a chance against Shuusaku."

And, under his breath. "I'll show him that."

Suyon whirled around to face Hikaru's retreating form. "W-Wait Shindou! What do you mean by that?!"

Across a few glamorous, glittering hallways, Waya was sprawled next to Isumi on a plush dark leather couch facing against the windows. The two of them were peering at the crowd that was beginning to form, or rather, Isumi watched the moving sea of people closely, while waya wondered what they were doing here. Of course, he wanted to see Shindou play (and, admittedly, Touya as well) but neither of the two had arrived yet and probably wouldn't be doing so for a while, and so Waya was left to question why they were here so freakishly early.

"Seems all of the players haven't arrived yet." Isumi scouted, peering about.

Waya shrugged over his pinstripe sweatshirt, and Isumi noticed how Waya always seemed to be wearing the latest fashion statement. Remarkably odd in the go world, seeing Touya who dressed like a man in his forties with all his argyle knit sweaters, and Ogata, who perpetually dressed like he was going to a strip club. And of course Hikaru, with his completely unprofessional bleached hair. Waya looked so...normal compared to them. They both did, he supposed.

"We'll be able to catch them all here," Waya shrugged, as he pointed out that they were seated right before the entrance. "Why so anxious, anyway?"

The redhead frowned in puzzlement as Isumi seemed to shake in slight laughter.

"I'm just looking forward to their shocked faces when they see you." He chuckled.

Waya's brows knit. "What's wrong with how I look...?" And then, with a bit more annoyance. "Wait a minute! Don't tell me you dragged me all the way here for that..."

"Uh—Um..." Isumi blinked sheepishly. "Of course not." He hedged.

He looked up then, to catch two people walking towards them.

"It's Isumi-san!" One of them smiled.

Isumi raced to meet them. "Chao Shii! Yan Hai-san!" He greeted cheerfully, and Waya supposed they knew each other.

The two suddenly turned to see Waya, who was now standing up, equally shocked expressions on their faces.

"Li Ping?!" They began in unison.

"Wahhh!" The shorter of the two clapped his hands together in admiration. "A larger version of Li Ping!"

"Almost a complete clone..." The other trailed off, and Waya cowed backwards slightly, unused to being peered at so closely.

He turned to see Isumi cackling in laughter. "Heh, so what do you think?"

"Isumi!!" He turned to the older boy. "What the hell—?!"

But the dark-haired boy wasn't paying any attention. "Yan Hai-san, it's been a long time. Thank you for taking care of me while I was abroad in China."

Waya blinked in understanding, but hardly had time to say anything as the smaller boy got right up under his nose to watch him with unblinking, wondering eyes that made Waya flinch and near stumble backwards as the boy said something in Chinese.

"You came all the way here just to say hello?" Yan Hai was saying. "And so this was the Waya you spoke of. He really does look like a larger version of Li Ping..."

"Speaking of Li Ping," Isumi began. "How is he? He surely must have grown since the last time I saw him, its been almost a year now."

Yan hai laughed good naturedly. "No, no, he's still a little trouble maker."

"Little trouble maker?" Isumi echoed.

The two descended into small talk, as Waya fidgeted slightly as he listened on.

As the two chatted, time ticked on.

It wouldn't be too long now...

((before you ask which way to go))

"Everyone here's so formal..." Yashiro grumbled, struggling with his tie. "It kind of creeps me out."

Shindou only shrugged, leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets. He had to admit, it was a bit unnerving, but there was a calming balm that covered him knowing that his victory was assured in Sai's hands. He wondered how Yashiro would take it if he told him that he would win because he had subconsciously formed an alter ego in the shape of Shuusaku. He chuckled mirthlessly as he imagined the near flabbergasted way Yashiro would squawk.

"_Hikaru..." _Sai admonished slightly, but altogether seemed to do it more jokingly than realistically.

"Touya seems to blend right in." Hikaru remarked slowly, as Akira walked towards them down the long stretch of expensive carpet in the hallway.

"Yeah well, he was practically born to be here." Yashiro began tempestuously. "That doesn't count."

Hikaru couldn't argue with that, and once Akira leveled with them the three began to make their way to the entrance hallway. The representatives from Korea and China were already there, and Hikaru would be lying if he said his palms weren't even a bit sweaty. Not to mention how much he simply wanted to show the world that Japan wasn't behind. They too, had a new wave of players, regardless of what everyone else seemed to think about them. There was him, Touya, Yashior, Waya and Isumi, and even Ochi (admittedly).

Akira walked up to one of the Chinese representatives, a Yan Hai, and began in perfect, fluent mandarin, "Nice to meet you, I am Touya Akira."

Hikaru and Yashiro blinked, obviously impressed.

"Ah," Obviously, so was the man. "I didn't know you spoke Mandarin."

"No, just a little." Touya began politely, and even though he had no idea what they were saying, it was obvious that Touya was being his usual polite self. Hikaru sweat dropped. Honestly...it was like that guy came out of the womb with an impressive feet of mannerisms. "I've only begun learning."

"Pretty soon you'll be giving me tips!" The Chinese man rubbed the back of his head, and Touya bowed.

But Hikaru wasn't too interested in that, he was scanning the crowd for Ko Yongha. Neither him or Suyon had arrived yet, and he wondered where they were. He curled his hands in his palms, wishing for a chance to show up the haughty young Korean Pro. Or rather, he was waiting for a perfect opportunity to let Sai kick his ass. While certainly, his playing had improved, Sai's still completely overshadowed his. Hikaru had to admit, after he had confessed to Akira the truth between him and Sai, he could almost feel the lines between them blurring until he could hardly make out the line anymore. Sometimes, he even did things he usually would never do. Little things, like how he held his pencil or the way he picked stones out of the goke.

A couple old people came up to greet them and Hikaru had to stop his laughter when Yashiro dismissed them so easily. Yashiro was never one for respect for the elderly (not like Hikaru could really say much either) and certainly playing go had done little to improve that.

The man was saying something, but Hikaru had tilted his head in a completely different direction, to watch for Hon Suyon and Ko Yongha. Neither of the two were there yet...

"There you guys are!" A Korean man's voice jolted him, and he snapped his head to the direction where the man in the white pinstripe suit was turned to.

A man—boy, but you couldn't tell from his aloof eyes—with long, auburn colored hair that covered a bit of his eyes with its wispy ends, wearing a white suit. Suyon seemed to be making a visible effort to match his strides, as such with the notable height difference the two had. It was almost comical, and if Hikaru hadn't been so wired up and tense he may have laughed. But then, something about Suyon always made him laugh, perhaps it was just the kids perpetually scowling face, or maybe just because he couldn't help remembering how horrid his Japanese was the last time he'd seen him.

Another look and Yongha and he knew that if Akari was here she'd been on him like a fly to—

Shit.

Hikaru _had _invited her, hadn't he?

"_Yes, you did!" _Sai replied helpfully.

"_You're really not helping my mood, you know." _Hikaru mentally sighed.

It was bad enough he didn't even get to play him.

–

_Of course first board is Touya, Hikaru scoffed to himself. Who else would it be?_

_Even then, the thought did nothing to placate him. The fact being, Touya was first board, and he wasn't. Regardless of what he wanted, it probably wasn't going to change. He knew he needed to keep a level head on this—just because he was dying to show that Korean bastard what Sai could do, didn't mean he was prepared to take on the guy. And Touya certainly was. _

_After Kurata had left the room, Yashiro seemed to have noticed the near palpable tension, and had left with a meek, "I think I'll go check on that tea..."_

_Hikaru said nothing as he left, leaning on his arms with his legs crossed in front of him, staring down the sea of black and white atop the goban. Just because he understood the reasoning, doesn't mean he had to be happy about it._

"_It's not that big of a deal, anyway." Sai began quickly. "I mean, sure I'd like to play him, but it doesn't really mean much. There's other people out there."_

_Hikaru wouldn't hear any of it, though._

_Touya sat himself quietly, opposite of the brooding blonde. _

"_Do you want to play him that bad?" He asked softly, eyes not leaving the board, dark hair closing over his bright azure eyes._

_Hikaru's breath hitched, before he let it out slowly. "Nah, it doesn't really matter."_

_For a moment, they sat in silence, and Hikaru was sure that Touya was simply going to let the matter be and not press the issue further. He was wrong._

"_Does _Sai _want to play him?" Touya rephrased it, and it seemed to have the desired effect._

_Hikaru mulled it over silently before answering._

"_Of course." Hikaru answered sullenly. "It's a challenge to him. And he worships Shuusaku like a god." The blonde had conveniently left out that the notion was the same for him as well. "So its almost like a personal insult."_

_Touya looked up then, as if he seemed to understand, but didn't quite know how to put it into words. _

"_But I'd probably loose my cool playing him." The boy began again, with a yawn. "So it's probably better if you played him, anyway."_

No matter what he had said, he still wished that it was him who was first board. Not for the fame, just for the battle.

The attendant was blushing particularly hard as she fidgeted with yongha'ss flower, who seemed as uninterested and distasteful as usual.

A voice came of the PA announcing that it was okay for them to now enter the ballroom, just as everyone's attention had turned to the handsome pro.

Hikaru was almost too engrossed in staring down the Korean Go player to hear Kurata call his name.

"Eh?" He turned around, in time to see an attendant escort Team Japan into the ballroom.

"Thank you all for attending the opening ceremony of the Hokuto Cup—

Hikaru didn't bother to listen to the MC, more busy scanning the crowd of men (mostly) and determined to avoid looking at the aggravating Korean.

As they announced Team Japan, and then Team China, and of course Team Korea, Hikaru was still scanning the crowd. For a go tournament, it seemed to be quite lively, the MC barely heard over the large chatter of the people gathered. Perhaps because it was the younger generation, more people had showed up besides the usual old people who watched go. The announcer came up and introduced a couple things, a few opening remarks he and there, beginning with an explanation of his company.

And then, they had to shake hands and plaster fake smiles on their faces, to which Hikaru could easily feel Yashiro stiffen considerably next to him.

"Geez..." The silver haired pro groaned. "What is up with all this crap? Pictures, formalities...its a go tournament for gods sake, what does this have anything to do with go?"

Hikaru only chuckled mirthlessly, getting himself a helping of whatever that good smelling stuff was.

"This better not tire us out." The boy added grumpily. "We do have to play matches tomorrow."

Hikaru didn't catch the rest of whatever his friend was saying, to busy mulling over Suyon's reaction, or lack thereof. The younger boy had yet to approach him, and Hikaru was unaware of how to take that. Did that mean that it wasn't a misunderstanding after all? That Ko Yongha really meant what he said? Hikaru, if possible, glared harder at the other boy.

The MC began saying something else, to which Kurata near head dived to begin the drawing. Even from his spot near the food, Hikaru could spy Akira's obviously embarrassed reaction to their team manager. Honestly...the 7-dan was a plausible reason to want to hide in a corner and sink into the floor. As if his antics weren't bad enough when they were off camera...

And he was even more likely to do so on stage.

For a moment, Hikaru watched the younger Touya as he quickly averted his eyes in embarrassment as Kurata near head dived for the drawings, and was tempted to follow in suit when he turned around abruptly and headed to the bathroom when Kurata got on stage, but figured it would look bad if all of Team Japan suddenly disappeared once their manager went up, seeing as though Yashiro had mysteriously disappeared as well.

The Chinese manager had made a subtle remark about chaperoning the kids, as they were susceptible to getting into trouble.

He blinked, wondering how much of that was a vague statement and how much could possible be directed at him.

When representatives from the teams themselves were called up, Touya had some how miraculously reappeared from whatever hole he had run into to stave off the embarrassment of watching Kurata to walk on stage completely composed as usual. The blond wondered how a boy his age could be so calm and speak so well in front of such an audience. If that was him, he'd probably have wedged a finger into his ear, yawned, and bullshitted a speech littered with vulgar words. Or perhaps, that was simply his nature compared to Touya's, and had nothing to do with their age.

His eyes met Yongha's on stage, and there was something fiery between them he couldn't quite grasp. Nothing like the chilled rivalry between him and Akira. As they finally broke off gazes as Yongha stepped up to the microphone, he mused that perhaps it wasn't entirely a bad thing that he had such anger for the Korean 3-dan. It certainly gave him some sort of fire he hadn't had since he had clear evidence of who was Akira's real rival and who was not.

Five minutes later, Hikaru realized that the emotions he felt for Akira and Yongha were quite different.

For one, he wanted to drop kick the girl-attracting Korean in the face, while he could simply pleasantly argue out his anger with Touya. Mere words simply could not convey his readiness to pound Yongha's face into the concrete—over the Goban or no—and meager yelling just wouldn't do.

"_I'd love to see him so smug away from the Go board..." _He began with much ire, clearly remembering his street brawling days with his fellow sixth graders, to which Akari had always wailed at him to stop.

Needless to say, when said pro came up and said the same words to his face (in Korean, so the bad-ass of it was lost in translation) Hikaru's anger didn't subside.

He would have been delighted to hear the Korean Manager's words, "Mr. Yan was right, no matter how strong your Go, you're still an immature kid."

* * *

_Pretty much paraphrasing the manga. Just have to lay down the ground work. _


End file.
